I went to the bar to grab another beer and a woman dressed in latex approached me.

At first I was a bit surprised. It’s rare that someone will just start talking to me out of nowhere. It’s possible that this is because I clearly have the strength of ten men and always look so very intimidating.

The conversation went a little like this:

Her-Someone told me you were an excellent slave.

Me-Really? I’m not sure who would have told you that since I’ve never been owned by anyone, but..ok.

Her- Be a good slave and buy me a drink, maybe later I’ll let you worship my feet.

Me- Well, you know, I’m not submissive to just anyone.

Her- I don’t let just anyone worship me.

Me- You’re kind to offer but I’m afraid I’ll need to pass.

Her- You’re not much of a slave are you?

Me- I’m not a slave at all for someone who doesn’t deserve it.

Instead of sounding coy I sounded harsh. It came out meaner than I meant but I was OK with that. I stood there for a minute, waited for my beer and joined my friends.   

I realized that, had she asked me a year ago, I would have bought her that drink, she probably would have ignored me for the rest of the night anyway unless she needed another drink. I wished she had asked differently, maybe I would have made a new friend out of it.

I told my story to another submissive guy at the party and he asked if I could point her out to him. I did and he ran off to go ask if she needed a drink. She gave him her oder and sure enough she ignored him for the rest of the night.

Pleasurists is a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days from bloggers all around the sex blogosphere. Did you miss Pleasurists #34? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #36? Submit it here before Sunday July 5th at 11:59pm PDT. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.

Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

• Birthday Giveaway! Deadline: Monday July 13th at noon Pacific Time.
• Cheebras Pin-Up Contest! Deadline: Entries MUST be received by midnight on July 4, 2009.
• Hello Kitty Vibe photo contest Deadline: September 1, 2009.

Madame Editrix
Scarlet Lotus St. Syr

On to the reviews…

Editor’s Pick

• Sublime by Carrie Ann

Insertion with this toy is wonderful. Thrusting is amazing. It’s girthy yet not huge, filling but not uncomfortable and the bumps and bulges really stimulate the inner labia and vaginal entrance.

Vibrators

• Evolved Bliss by the kitten pup
• AcuVibe Mini by Nadia West
• Adam & Eve Magic Massager by Beautiful Dreamer
• Buzz 1 by Sarah
• Fun Factory Boss by Beautiful Dreamer
• Silicone Slims G-teaser Vibrator in Purple by Baby Sinead
• Hide-A-Vibe by Sommer Marsden
• Treeze Wave by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
• Treeze Wave by Epiphora
• Love Cup by Beautiful Dreamer
• Acuvibe Mini by Marla Singer St. Syr
• Nubby Vibrating Glass by Sleeping Dreamer
• Dynamic Duo by Beautiful Dreamer
• Lovemoiselle Cecile by Nadia West
• Xtreme Kit by Beautiful Dreamer
• Flirty Plush Pack Magic Ball by Sleeping Dreamer
• The Cone by Athena Bradford
• Fun Factory Stranger II by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
• Total Ecstasy Triple Stimulator by Torri
• iLusting by Rimba by Mistress Says
• AcuVibe Mini by Carnivalesq
• Extreme Pack G-spot Bullet by the kitten pup
• AcuVibe Mini by Red
• Emotional Bliss Womolia by Exploring Intimacy
• Rabbit Rider by Adriana
• iVibe Egg by Epiphora
• Vibratex Pandora by Sexorcism

Dildos

• Fun Factory Bandito by Femme Mystique
• Echo by Essin’ Em
• Swirled G by Femme Mystique
• Glass Lattachino Double Dildo by Carnivalesq
• Mr. Man by Epiphora

Anal Toys

• Anal Pocket Rocket by Eliot Bodem
• Rascal Deep Cleansing Kit by Sexorcism
• Fun Factory Bootie by Carrie Ann
• EGlass Petite Plug by Sexorcism
• Nexus G-Rider by Domina Doll on Viviane’s Sex Carnival
• Pipe Dreams PE Vibe by Sexpert Joe

Toys for Cocks

• Fleshlight replacement sleeve Turbo tube by Average Joe

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

• JimmyJane Afterglow by Beautiful Dreamer
• Sensuous Soak Kit by Alpine Subdreams
• Love Liquid by Epiphora
• Good Clean Love by Domina Doll
• BabeGloss by Sexorcism
• ID Moments by Beautiful Dreamer

BDSM/Fetish

• 36 Inch Spreader Bar by Essin’ Em
• Pink and Black Double-Strand Beaded Nipple Clamps by Sleeping Dreamer
• Electrify-It Kit by Red

Adult Books/Games

• Kama Sutra Year Book by The Duchess
• 52 Weeks Kits by Jessie M

Adult Movies/Porn

• No Fauxxx by Carnivalesq
• Star Trix Versus This Ain’t Star Trek XXX by Champagne and Benzedrine
• Collin and Hurley by The Porn Librarian
• White Wedding by FrzKey
• Crash Pad Series – Episode 12: Johnny & Legs by J.D. Bauchery
• Bang That Bitch 4 by The Porn Librarian
• Cry Wolf by FrzKey
• The Best of Vulva Massage by Eliot Bodem
• Dare to Bare by Sexorcism
• Matt and Khym: Better than Ever by Domina Doll on Viviane’s Sex Carnival

Lingerie

• Wet Look Elbow Length Gloves by Thursday’s Child
• Astrea I vibrating brief by Epiphora
• XOXO Leather Peek-A-Boo Thong by Sexorcism

Miscellaneous

• ForPlay Toy Cleaner by Wilhelmina Wang
• Doc Johnson Pussy Pump by Red

Over the past couple of years, I’ve been forced to confront my own ageism. You can’t date (and swing with) someone 18 years your senior without getting a good long look about your ingrained thoughts on aging and sex. We live in a society where older people, particularly older women, are desexualized. A woman past menopause is seen as fairly asexual. And it’s assumed that older men can’t get it up, but they can sometimes be “dirty old men” leering at attractive young women (which is considered kinda gross but expected – at least men get to retain some sex drive!).

What’s up with that? Our sexuality doesn’t automatically turn off at a certain age. I read a letter to Dear Abby a short while ago from a couple in their 80s who are enjoying a robust sex life, and they wanted to know how to keep their kids and grandkids from dropping by unannounced while they’re having sex. I thought this was fantastic. But when I saw a woman, probably in her mid to late 60s at the party we attended last Saturday, I thought (and said to MasterDoc), “Oh my god that woman’s so old!” MD didn’t take kindly to that comment seeing as he’s about 10-15 years away from that woman’s age. I tried to back track, “But, she looks like someone’s grandmother. I don’t expect someone’s grandmother to be at a swing/bdsm party.” He asked me, “Why not?” And I had to pause. Why not indeed?

While this woman’s wrinkled face gave away her age, she was in good shape and fashionably dressed. But even if she wasn’t, why the hell shouldn’t she experience and express her sexuality? Why was I putting her into this category of someone who shouldn’t be at a swing party? (I don’t go around thinking fat people shouldn’t be at swing parties, for instance. Lucky for me, seeing as I’m overweight.) It unfortunately comes down to my unconsciously buying into the societal idea that older people aren’t/shouldn’t be sexual. And there’s an added layer – we perceive older people being sexual as being “disgusting.” Why is that? Jeez, I hope that when I’m older I still have an active sex life. I don’t plan to dry up and wither away at age 60 or something. What is disgusting about an older person receiving pleasure? (We’re taught that only young bodies are attractive and that older bodies are unattractive.) While my brain still puts forth all these ageist ideas, at least now I’m looking at them, and pondering why I think that way and if I really should think that way.

It’s about time we let seniors be sexual. I’m going to work on my own negative reactions and try to overcome the stigma I’ve learned. I don’t expect it to improve over night, but it’s been gradually wearing away over the past couple of years.

As a longtime fan of njoy toys (sponsors of the 2010 NYC Sex Bloggers Calendar), and a newer fan of Comstock Films (I’ll be reviewing Marie and Jack: A Hardcore Love Story on my blog in the next few weeks), I was thrilled to hear about this endeavor joining the two together. While I would love to be able to take advantage of this fabulous opportunity, I don’t live anywhere near New York, but I thought I’d pass it on in hopes that one of you might be able to jump on it!

“One of the problems in being an erotic filmmaker is that there is almost nothing to emulate. The world is filled with all sort of example of what not to do, but very little in the way of what one might try. As a result, most of the inspiration for my films from outside the world of explicit images. And in the 20 or so years I’ve been making erotic images, one of the most inspiring things I’ve ever come across is the work of Greg DeLong at Njoy Toys.

Whether or not these toys hit  your sweet spot is a matter of personal preference (some people like snails, some people like mussels.) But what is inarguable is that Greg’s line of Njoy Toys are made with the same attention to detail, personal pride, and acknowledgement of the customer’s humanity that we simply take for granted in things like bicycle components or bathroom fixtures. From Greg’s choice of materials, to his designs, to his packaging and marketing, the sort of shabbiness and shamefulness that seems utterly taken for granted in the sex industry is utterly absent in Greg’s work. There is neither the vulgarity that is so common, nor the clinical affect that is so often offered in it’s place. Greg takes his customers’ sexual pleasure seriously, and Greg takes himself seriously.

Greg and I have long talked about a collaboration, an adventure in cinema that would serve as a venue for our sexual and creative philosophies, and also be good business for Njoy Toys and Comstock Films; and after letting this roll around for a few years we have the answer. The only thing missing is you!

CASTING CALL

Prospective subjects sought for short documentary-style promotional film featuring NJoy Toys stainless steel pleasure instruments.

Requirements and other information:

1) You should be an Njoy enthusiast. Tell us what Njoy pieces you own, how you learned about Njoy and what in particular you love about your favorite piece.

2) You should be in the New York area. We will be shooting tests on Super16, with final production shot on 35mm. You will need to be available to the production on an on-going basis over the course of 4-8 weeks. (3-4 in-person meetings total.)

3) You need to really think through what it means to be appear on camera nude and using Njoy products. As the saying goes,  you can’t unring a bell.

4) This film is a commercial endeavor and there will be (modest) compensation.

To be considered please send e-mail telling us about you and your Njoy adventures, along with photo(s) of you an your Njoy Toys to njoydoc at comstockfilms dot com.

If you have a blog or a newsletter or whatever else and it would be appropriate, we would be very grateful if you repost this!

Thanks for your interest!”

Crossposted from here

When I threw out all of my old and now too big underwear, one of the agreements that I made with my husband was to wear thong underwear more often. He didn’t care what kind of thong underwear it was, whether lacy or skimpy, see thru or plain cotton – as long as the back was a thong. I agreed, and he bought me an entire lingerie drawer full of new underwear, almost all of them thongs, though he did let me keep a few pairs of regular ol’ bikini panties.

I wear a thong almost every day now – I’m getting used to the feeling of wearing them, learning which pairs are comfortable and what kind I prefer. I’ve even gotten used to the feeling of my ass hanging out – I’ve started to understand why my husband thinks it’s sexy. But there are days when I wish I could go back to wearing my old so-called “granny panties”, and it’s not for the reason you’d probably think!

Apparently, there is something a little too sexy about wearing thongs! My husband doesn’t seem to be able to keep his hands off me when he finds that I’m wearing one. Just one peek beneath the hem of my nightgown, and if he sees those exposed globes of flesh, he’s all wandering hands and questing fingers. He’s instantly hard, pressing himself against my back, working the back of my nightgown higher and higher… Then he’s naked, and I’m naked but for my thong, and I’m over his lap while he slaps and caresses my ass… Well, you get the picture.

Normally, I wouldn’t complain – I love my husband and he’s fantastic in bed! But sometimes his attentions get to be a bit…problematic. Like when he’s getting dressed for work, and the sheet slips down revealing a glimpse of my thigh and a little higher. And then he goes in rather late or sporting a very obvious erection through the thin material of his suitpants. Or when we’re biking together, and my shorts ride down to expose that well known “whale tail” – so far we’ve been able to make it back home, but it’s just a matter of time before we end up half-naked on the side of the road under the gazes of a pasture full of horses. Last week, we were so oversexed that we were entirely too sore for any further lovemaking, yet that glimpse of thong was enough and I ended up on my back against the headboard with my ankles near my ears.

Sometimes I think that the Surgeon General should put a warning label on thongs – just like they have on cigarettes and alcohol. Something like, Warning: May Cause Excessive Sexing, Sore Chafed Pussy Lips, Rampant Overfucking, and Overwhelming Orgasms that may cause you to pass out and try to run from the bedroom. Of course, I never have any success running out of the bedroom – as soon as I turn around and he sees my sweet ass pertly displayed in that cute little thong, I don’t even make it to the door before he’s all over me! Is it any wonder that today I’m wearing the cutest little bikini panties?! A girl needs a break from all that fucking sometimes, but don’t worry – I’ll be back to wearing a thong by tomorrow. After all, I’m no fool – I know exactly what wearing a thong will do to him and I slip it over my thighs and tug it in place over my hips knowing that it’s just going to come right off again!

-Thursday’s Child

Celebrate Sexual Freedom on Wednesday, July 1st at Happy Ending Lounge.

The Pleasure Salon has been created to build community, allowing sex-positive activists to cross-pollinate. Our gatherings bring together members of the BDSM, swinger, alternative gender, LGBT, sex-activist, sex educator, nudist, sex-magic, polyamory, Pagan, radical faerie, tantra, dark odyssey, sex-blogger, porn, pervert and sex-worker communities, and others whose passion is sex. (Let us know if we missed any one of you!) Through building networks in the sex-positive community, The Pleasure Salon hopes to help create a sex-positive world. It is a place for the open exchange of ideas and sensual expression.

Join us in building New York’s pleasure positive community, and bring your like-minded friends to this social gathering. The Pleasure Salon embraces respect, acceptance, and non-judgmental support in this public space.

Happy Ending Lounge, 302 Broome St, NYC, NY.

6:00-10:00pm

It was  a few months ago that while I was having brunch with Sinclair and Kristen we discussed the upcoming 2010 calendar that was still in the planning stages.  The one thing Sinclair said he would really like to change this year is for us to keep the printing here in the US instead of sending it overseas.  Many of us involved all felt the same way but we also didn’t think we could afford to print it here in the USA.

While trying to coordinate more than a dozen models with twelve photographers for photo shoots,  obtaining sponsors and selling days on the calendar we realized our time for being able to print overseas was running out.  Last week I started looking into US printers.  At that moment I didn’t know the first thing about printing but I had two things to help me.  The Internet and twitter.

With the help of others we have been obtaining quotes for printers in the US and although the price is a few dollars higher per calendar we all felt it was worth the extra expense to keep the work in this country in light of how our economy and job market are at this time.

That also means that our original cut off date of June 28th to sell days has been extended.  We will now be pre-selling calendars and personalized calendar days until August 1st.   You can purchase them by visiting  The NYC Sex Blogger Calendar site.

Help support Sex Work Awareness by buying your personalized day today!

I did a really fun bondage and foot fetish scene with a lovely lady named Candle. This is the first foot fetish scene I’ve ever done!!!! The guys running the show were nice enough to snap off some behind the scenes shots so that I can show you guys!

This scene was for eatmyfeet.com. What a great name for a site huh! I liked that I didn’t have to dress up all fetishy for this. I like to play dress up every now and then, but there is something hot about just being in regular clothes and still topping a girl (or guy, either way!). The funny part about the whole thing is that I had actually gotten bored a couple nights before and painted my toenails. I normally never paint my toenails because I never really have time enough to sit still as the polish dries. When I got to the set I was expecting to just do some bondage, but when the producer saw my cute toes he changed it up to include foot fetish instead!! But of course I had to add some bondage in there anyway ;)

Anyway, back to the scene! The girls on set were Candle and Carly. I came in to find Candle forcing Carly to suck on her toes and lick her soles. I got pissed, freed Carly and sent her away, and then I turned the tables on Candle!! I tied her up and made her suck on my toes, lick my heels, and smothered her face with my feet. In the end Carly came back all dressed up and she and I went out to a party, leaving Candle all tied up with no where to go!

Here are some BTS shots for you all!

I was invited recently to take part in a Sex Blogger Q&A at TES Fest next week. Of course Tess got a big kick out of that one because when was the last time I wrote about actually having sex  on my blog.

But for me these days sex blogging isn’t about writing about the hot sex. I entered the world of sex blogs almost two years ago as someone who was totally unaware of so much in this world of sex and since that time I have received quite the education.

What I personally think is important about sex blogs and sex bloggers is the information that it provides to people. I know better than anyone that you can’t believe everything you read in a blog but I also know that sex blogs help to spread the word and educate people about sex, relationships and events such as TES Fest 2009.

I wanted to attend TES Fest 2009 as a “newbie.” Someone who normally would not have considered going and then write about my experiences. I wanted to sit in on classes that not only interested me but also ones that I would not have normally considered and then write about them on my personal blog and here on Best Sex Bloggers because I think there are many like myself who are interested or curious about events such as this yet on the fence about actually attending.

I’m sad to say that my attending TES Fest this year for the Sex Blogger Q&A panel is not going to happen. Looking at the schedule it just didn’t work for me the day that the panel was scheduled.

I’ve had contact with some of the people organizing TES Fest this year and also have seen the schedule of classes. It looks to be a really great event with everything they have planned for next weekend. Online registration closes at 11:59pm EST tomorrow and then the price of passes will increase.

If you’re on the fence about attending or just curious (like I was) I recommend trying a one day pass for Friday to check it out. That gives you the option of attending the rest of the weekend if you find yourself enjoying the day and evening there.

If you do attend drop me a line and let me know how your experience was. Here are more of the details:

Open the Curtain and Sneak a Peak at the TES Fest 2009 Special Events

TES Fest 2009 is more than just exceptional classes and a world class play space; from July 2 to July 5. We have over 40 special events to help us celebrate our favorite kinks together! Here is a sampling of what we have in store for you:

The party starts right as the doors open! For everyone who comes on Thursday, Jeff R. and Mistress Trish are jumpstarting your weekend with the Opening Night Mixer down by the pool.

After a full day of classes on Friday, start your night off with a Meet & Greet. There are a number of special interest group Meet & Greets, including the Novice Group, TNG and the Animal Planet. After these, we shall all come together for the General Meet & Greet in the Main Dungeon. Help support the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom by placing a bid at the Celebrity Auction for the chance to play with some of the hottest people in the scene. Spend the night floating at the Late Night Latex Pool Party, where Xris Smack will be dropping the club jams into the wee hours.

TES is nothing if not patriotic, and there is nothing more American than cooking food on open flames for the Fourth of July. Let us celebrate our freedom at the July 4th BDSM BBQ. After filling up, try your luck at the TES Fest Kinky Casino Royale, complete with off-track betting at the Seahorse Race Track.

Just because it’s the last day of TES Fest doesn’t mean that Sunday isn’t packed with even more special events. Whether you want to attend the Kinky Ladies’ Afternoon Tea Party or you want to throw down at the TES Fest Fight Club Night, just remember, the first rule of Fight Club is don’t talk about the Kinky Ladies’ Afternoon Tea Party…err… uh… Fight Club.

Everyone deserves to be pampered, whether you’ve slaved away your day in five-inch stilettos or spent the night punching and whipping some willing bottom. Come to Cloud 9, where throughout the weekend, the angels will give you luxurious massages and the tender love and care you want.

Full Event, 2-Day and Single Day Passes are on sale today, and hotel rooms are still available. Don’t be left out because you waited till the last minute. We sold out last year and expect to do so this year. Register now at www.tesfest.org