Jan 01 2009

Out With The Old, In With The New

Do I need crazy? Do I want crazy? Ask me one minute, I’ll give you one answer. Ask me another and you’ll get a different one.

I have thought about what to write for my New Year’s post and if I even wanted to recall 2008 at all. I ushered in that year as a first class passenger riding the crazy train. I spent the first half of 2008 trying to find my way and knowing that I needed to get off that crazy train if I was ever going to be happy again.

The quote above is something Tess had written in her New Year’s post last year and like so many things that Tess writes it really struck home with me. It became my constant companion those first few months of the year with all of the crazy things that were going on in my life.

One of the best things I did in 2008 was start therapy. I found a wonderful therapist who has helped me tremendously this year. My only regret is that I spent several months in the beginning not telling her the full truth of what was really going on in my life. Once I opened up and was totally honest with her everything for me changed.

I think the turning point for me this year was my trip to California with Tess over 4th of July. It gave me the space and time I needed to make the decisions in my life that I knew all along but couldn’t find the strength for.

August found me in the center of a blogstorm when after Dacia, Rachel and Tess all spoke out about Jefferson aka Onelifetaketwo I also made the decision to do the same. I then did something I always thought and said I would never do and that was talk about my true relationship with Jefferson which you can read about here, here and here. Since that time I have often said that the only thing good about my relationship with Jefferson was the sex. Thankfully I have since come to know that even that was mediocre at best.

Many things changed for me in September when Tess came up with the brilliant idea to create the NYC Sex Bloggers Calendar as a benefit for Sex Work Awareness. My world was opened up to an entirely new CommUNITY of people and companies. I found many new friends and saw the wonderful things that this CommUNITY could do when we all worked together.

I learned that not only did I have nice legs but I had some nice cleavage too. All thanks once again to my friend Tess.

In November we had our calendar launch party that was a huge success although some of the best stories came from the after party later at our hotel. I got the best foot rub I have ever had and made some life long friends that night. My only regret is that I didn’t win that damn Eleven from Njoy our major sponsor of the calendar. I also found myself somewhere that in a million years I would never have dreamed of. Time Out - New York.

December was extremely busy for me between the upcoming holiday’s and working on promoting and selling the calendar. It was also an emotional month when I attended the SWP holiday meet and greet and the sex workers vigil. They both left their mark on me.

Now it is 2009 and time to look at the future. 2008 was one of the most difficult years I have had in my life. There were some wonderful things I found in 2008 with all the new friends I made and the things I discovered about myself but with that came a lot of pain, hurt and sadness. I hope to never have a year like that again. There are many new changes in my future now that I am finally headed in the right direction. Some will be just as difficult as the ones in 2008 but the difference is that these are all positive changes that will hopefully lead me to happiness.


Dec 12 2008

Lochai and Madison are to hang together until March 11, 2009!!

Well, you read it here first.  If you read the post about Lochai and Madison Young’s show at The Center for Sex and Culture in San Francisco, it was posted here last week.   It was a really interesting Post about Lochai’s work called “Unspoken Bond”  featuring Lochai and Madison in Bondage.  The work that was talked about was an oil painting that is being produced portraying the two most reknowned names in many arenas of the Kink, Fetish & Bondage Art World.

That’s where I come in…….The Bondage Art World.  I think I just created a new term for it.  I am Nancy Peach Erotic Artist.  No, it’s not a fictitious name.  I was born with it and I wasn’t about to change it when I got married and I’m not about to change it because I am identified as being in this controversial world of Erotic Arts!!

I am proud of being able to take a stand and say this is Art, take a look!

I’m very raw and quite emotional today, more than usual.  That’s a funny statement, what is usual!!  Especially in this life of being close to the heart and soul.  Not only am I close to mine, but quite intimately close to my subjects.   I spend my life opening up on a regular basis, it’s a way of life if you want to capture the essence of someone.

My life is constantly challenging me to speak my truth and convey it on my canvases.  I have quite rapidly been confronted and provoked about my creative work.  I wonder what Picasso went through when he first was way off with his depiction of his subject!!

I’m thoroughly pissed off right now and angry about the closed minds, the quick spitfire opinions that feel that they have to be said because “doesn’t the artist need critiscm?? leadership???input???guidance???”"

This artist is making so many statements about the world of creativity, freedom of expression, politics, beauty & most importantly expressing what so many want to express, but can’t because of what the consequences might be for them in their life.  Someday I will talk about the repression I lived!! for so many many years!!

Today, I am here right now to really give anyone and everyone an opportunity to support this really important commUNITY??  Only a few short years ago, there were laws that kept us from our freedoms.  The freedom to transmitt erotic images on the internet!!!.

Today, I’m celebrating so many many freedoms I have.  Today is Friday and on Monday, December 15, Lochai and Madison will be hung at The Center for Sex and Culture.   The venue alone is one to support!!! They are here to speak so very strongly for our cause.  Sexual Freedom and our rights to speak, expose, promote, create and express this form of art.

Lochai is a man that I have not even met as of yet.  I have read most of what I could find about him and fell in love with his photography.  He is a man of many facets with strengths that he wears  quite honestly and open.  I found myself not doing the photography on this piece of work and to my amazement, not even being at the shoot in the Armory!!  My intuition and trust is right at my side at all times when I am practicing my art.

Today, I’m feeling really alive and excited,as this show comes closer to the day of the opening.  The way for me to really live life is to let go and let it all happen in conjunction with the universe.  The man and woman I have been living with for the past month have integrated their strong presence with me.  Deeply I feel and deeply I evoke my emotions upon this creation!  I’m the Alchemist.  Just here to provide the instrument that will record and project upon the viewer, their own feelings that are stirred up when they view the work!.

Come if you can!!  It’s next Friday evening at 6pm-10pm.  This Opening will be a mixture of so much that has contributed to this expression.  I have learned so much.  I have been keeping the details of the work quiet, as Lochai has requested that he walk in and be surprised. !

As the days, get close I will expose a little more, but not until after Lochai sees it will I publish the work.  Rope Bondage, Rigger, Bondage Slut, Japanese Erotic Art, Shunga and Nawashi.  Just a few words that have become an integral parts of my vocabulary as I have created the art for this show.

Just one more note (Sorry for the long post, I promise I’ll work on shortening them!)

Lochai emailed me the other day with a bio that he wanted me to use for current information.  The words jumped off the page to me and I’m repeating what I read.  . . . . . . . . .

‘This painting is the greatest compliment ever paid to him.”

Hmmmmmm!  Feels so yummy.  I am blessed in so many ways through this process again and again!!

Check out The Center for Sex and Culture @ www.sexandculture.org as well as www.nancypeacherotic.com   Info about the show is the tab for current work.

"Madison in Bondage First"

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Dec 04 2008

Porn may decrease rape rates

Category: Freedom of Speech, News, Zille Defeuzilledefeu @ 8:43 pm

Hello! I’m back from my travels! I’ve got so much to write about that I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed (an excess of jet-lag may be adding to this feeling) so instead I’ll link to a post I got off Neil Gaiman’s blog today. It’s an article that points out a correlation between increasing consumers of internet porn, and decreasing rape statistics. Which I’ve been trying to tell people all along, but I didn’t have the stats and standing to back me up….

Rape, Porn and Criminality: Political Truth on Trial.

Here’s just a sample, the last few paragraphs….

Although the Reagan Commission had at its disposal all the evidence gathered by psychology and social-science departments throughout the world on the question whether a student’s exposure to pornography increased his tendency to commit antisocial acts, I found that the Commission was unable to adduce a shred of evidence to support its affirmative conclusion. No scientist had ever found that pornography raised the probability of rape. However, the Commission was not seeking truth; rather, as I said in the title to my article, it sought political truth.

Neither Professor Schauer nor the other Commissioners ever responded to my William & Mary article. Now they can forget it. For if they had been right that exposure to pornography leads to an increase in social violence, then the vast exposure to pornography furnished by the internet would by now have resulted in scores of rapes per day on university campuses, hundreds of rapes daily in every town, and thousands of rapes per day in every city. Instead, the Commissioners were so incredibly wrong that the incidence of rape has actually declined by the astounding rate of 85%.

Correlations aside, could access to pornography actually cause a decline in rape? In my article I mentioned one possibility: that some people watching pornography may “get it out of their system” and thus have no further desire to go out and actually try it. Another possibility might be labeled the “Victorian effect”: the more that people covered up their bodies with clothes in those days, the greater the mystery of what they looked like in the nude. The sight of a woman’s ankle was considered shocking and erotic. But today, internet porn has thoroughly de-mystified sex. Times have changed so much that some high school teachers of sex education are beginning to show triple-X porn movies to their students in order to depict techniques of satisfactory intercourse.

I am sure there will be other explanations forthcoming as to why access to pornography is the most important causal factor in the decline of rape. Once one accepts the observation that there is a precise negative correlation between the two, the rest can safely be left to the imagination.

What Anthony D’Amato doesn’t touch (for good reasons, I’m sure) is my theory that for people whom rape is a fantasy, getting to do rape-role-play can give them a way, between two consenting adults, to scratch that “itch” in a non-antisocial way. And I think seeing porn sites can give people who hadn’t really thought of sexual role-play as an option some new ideas on how to realize their fantasies without anyone getting hurt. Or the porn sites can simply give would-be rapists an outlet to jerk off and not actualize their fantasies at all (which I happen to know for sure is what a number of would be rapees do.)


Unrelated, here is a wonderful commentary on the horrible “Proposition 8″ that very sadly passed in the state where I live….

Prop 8 The Musical


Actually, in retrospect, that video is not unrelated. The close-minded people of the world (generally “the religious right”) think that both porn and gay marriage are bad things, and work to suppress and otherwise outlaw them. But both are really good things, and mostly bring joy and stabilty into the world. And people need to band together and support free speech and equal marriage rights for all.

I don’t often get up on a political soapbox. You lot come here for pleasure and diversion, and I respect and understand that. And I know that I get a wide variety of people coming through here, and I don’t want to alientate anyone. But these views are both near and dear to my heart, and I just had to share them.

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Aug 18 2008

“Never doubt that a small, group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.” — Margaret Mead

All the entires in the hat before the drawing

[Cross-posted from CatalinaLoves.com]

Thank you to everybody who participated in the raffle we held!  I am forever grateful and humbled by the experience.  I have to say it could not have been a success without the donations and the support of bloggers who cross-posted.  An extra-special thank-you to Lochai for starting this whole thing off by donating his limited edition, signed, WEAM prints and to Mistress Matisse, who sent literally thousands of people our way.   Truly, though, it is each individual, one by one, that made the difference.  My friends and total strangers donated their time, effort, energy, and products.  The moral support, the donations, the ticket purchases - it all is a result of a group of individuals making a difference.

Our CommUNITY has proven that we are strong and cohesive.  I’d like to announce the winners here, but I fear that I would be outting someone who would rather remain anonymous, so if you’d like to post a comment, you can tell everybody what you won - otherwise we’ll keep that between us.

I’ll leave you with my favorite quote by Margaret Mead: “Never doubt that a small, group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.”

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Aug 15 2008

The NCSF and SFLDEF are two important groups you should know about

Lolcat from Icanhascheezburger.com

Lolcat from Icanhascheezburger.com

It’s obvious that I’ve recently encountered issues with people who have deemed my writing as immoral. I have no problems admitting to the world that I am working towards a legitimate career as a sex writer and educator at the same time that I am working as a PR and Marketing consultant to some of the best known writers, photographers, models, and site owners. I have no shame in it. I recently shared my writing with my only family member, who was very supportive of my efforts to run my own business, to write articles as well as erotic fiction, and also as a mother. Being someone I respect as an educated woman with a doctorate in education, as well as as a Mom of three successful children, it meant the world to me to hear her say, “I love you, and I think you’re doing a great job, and your child is proof of it!”

Sometimes people aren’t satisified with sharing their disgust personally with the moral offender. It is in these instances that people who live an alternative lifestyle should know about two very important sites. These are cape-wearing defenders of freedom. I’ve spoken recently about the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom, but I wanted to write a separate post discussing both the NCSF and the Sexual Freedom Legal Defense and Education Fund.

The National Coalition for Sexual Freedom is “a national organization committed to creating a political, legal, and social environment in the United States that advances equal rights of consenting adults who practice forms of alternative sexual expression. NCSF is primarily focused on the rights of consenting adults in the SM-leather-fetish, swing, and polyamory communities, who often face discrimination because of their sexual expression.”

They offer some very practical advice, including how to deal with police officers if they are involved and how to travel with sex toys. In addition, they have a list of Kink-Aware Professionals - “The resource for people who are seeking psychotherapeutic, medical, and legal professionals who are informed about the diversity of consensual, adult sexuality” - who might be able to assist you, should the need arise to defend yourself, your lifestyle, or your family.

The SLFDEF states:

Polyamory, swinging, BDSM and fetishism are among the kinds of practices which may expose people to legal problems. We believe that parents should not lose custody of their children just because of the parents’ lifestyle or variety of sexual expression. We believe that people should not face criminal prosecution for consensual sexual expression among adults. We believe that the government should not interfere with consensual sexual expression among adults. Because we believe these things, we are working to provide:

  • Money towards legal and litigation expenses, such as attorney fees and expert witness fees.
  • Referrals to attorneys and expert witnesses knowledgeable about alternative sexual expression and willing to take cases dealing with it.
  • Public information and education about alternative sexual expression.

Both of these resources are available to our CommUNITY. Hopefully you will never need to call upon them, but they are very responsive and they will come to the rescue when and where they can.

My request to you, specifically, is if you have been lucky enough to avoid legal, career, or custodial issues by living your lives freely, that you consider donating directly to these organizations. I realize that you may have just donated via my raffle, but I’m speaking of the bigger picture.

If you can, when you can, keep these two organizations in mind for your socially conscious checkbooks. I know that Mark and I will both be stronger proponents and advocates for each of these groups as a result of their support and help to our CommUNITY.

The National Coalition For Sexual Freedom Donation Page

Sexual Freedom Legal Defense and Educational Fund

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Aug 14 2008

Why I Don’t Really Want Gay Marriage

This is going to piss some people off. Yes, I’m aware.

This is going to make some people stop reading me. Yes, I’m aware.

Here we go folks:

I don’t think we should have “gay marriage” in this country.

Shocker, I know.

Now, take a deep breath.

Let me clarify. I don’t think we should have marriage in this country, at all. Gay, straight, anything.

Why? To me, the idea of placing marriage in both a semi-religious AND governmental place is ludicrous. I mean, when you get married (legally), you gain OVER ONE THOUSAND NEW RIGHTS. And privileges. See, marriage is more than a ring. In my opinion, marriage is the government rewarding you on your ability to fall in love. And convince yourself that you’re still in love.

To me, this is dumb. Wtf people? So let’s say we get “gay marriage.” Great. Now Bob and Bill, and Jane and Joan can have the same rights as Jim and Sue. But what about Tom and Mary and Ashley, the poly triad that also lives on the same block. And what about Paul and Peter, Paul and Leah, and Paul and Taylor, with Paul being the guy who is maintaining several loving and committed relationships? Or how about Ann, who has realized that she doesn’t function so well in relationships, and is using this time to focus on herself, developing self-awareness, and celebrating HER? Or Sally, who loves her kids and her kitties, but only has casual sex partners (for any of a variety of reasons), and isn’t planning on falling in love and doesn’t want a long term partner, ever? Or Sergi and Jose, who have a long distance relationship that’s been ongoing for 3 years, but they don’t live in the same state (or possibly country)? Even if we have gay marriage, none of these people will be eligible for those thousand plus rights and privileges.

You know what really grinds my goose? The whole “sanctity of the institution of marriage” spiel. Now, I am NOT saying that individual marriages don’t have sanctity; I know many that do. I mean marriage as a whole. At the end of my freshman year, a group of friends got together, went down to city hall, and married themselves in sets of two. None of them were even dating. Why? Because you had to living on campus for 3 years unless: you were over 23, were a veteran, OR WERE MARRIED/in a domestic partnership (I went to a hippy school). So these geniuses decided to get married to each other in order to move off campus. Brilliant. And then their parents wound up having to hire lawyers and pay a good deal of money when they graduated, in order to get things straighted out. But clearly, the institution of marriage is crystal clear and squeaky clean.

I am not against committed relationships. I am CERTAINLY not against celebrations of said relationships. Weddings (that have nothing to do with the government), handfastings, commitment ceremonies, joint sky diving; whatever it is, celebrate your relationship(s). Register at all the places that make me drool (and if you get an extra food processor, PLEASE consider giving it to me). Get tipsy, dance, sing, celebrate you and your partner(s) (or just yourself, ala Carrie in Sex and the City) with your friends and family. I think that is a WONDERFUL idea.

However, why does this celebration of joy, love, trust, connection, etc, have to be tied in any way to the government? To who can visit whom in the hospital? To who can be told if their partner is MIA overseas? To who can adopt children? To tax rates? To _________? What does our caring and compassion and connection for another have to do with RIGHTS?

Miss Avarice and I were talking about this. She asked about a few things with her (usual) intellectualness. I will answer them.

a) Do ya think that queerness calls for a different relationship model? something different from marriage in that the pressure’s off, that you can love each other for a little while and leave when it’s time. why do things have to be so tricksy?

Yes and No. I think it has nothing to do with queerness. I think there should be MANY types of relationship models, and couples/groups/triads/etc can pick which one works for them. It shouldn’t HAVE to be monogamous OR poly. It shouldn’t HAVE to be short term or long term. I think people should define their own relationships. As a side note, I’d also like to stop separating “queer” out so much. Domestic partnerships can be participated in by hetero couples too, but no on ever talks about this. Marriage is marriage; not straight or gay. I feel this is becoming such a “separate but equal” shindig, and we all know what happened in the past with that.

b) Ok. How would partner benefits work at a job? if you couldn’t get married or otherwise officially partnered, what if one works and one doesn’t?

Well, firstly, in my utopia, we’d have awesome socialized health care. Having just been rejected for insurance, I feel passionately about this. Really passionately. But I mean now, look at companies with domestic partner benefits; they ask you to sign something (or at least say out loud) stating that you and your current partner are in a committed relationships, and love each other and _______. Fine. Let partners do that. But again, what about the poor single peeps (myself included)? And the people with multiple partners? Again, socialized health care for the win.

c) So, we should be able to join and separate in whatever non-legal way we choose whenever we want, and for partnerships where one supports the other, just tell your company that you love each other and that’s that.

Yup. Pretty much.

So to sum up:

*I don’t dislike married PEOPLE. I understand there are MANY reasons people get married, and tons are good reasons (college dorm situations none withstanding).
*I dislike the institution of marriage.
*I think the government has no business dealing with our relationship statuses.
*I think we should definitely celebrate our relationships.
*I think we need socialize health care AND NOW. Stat.

This is why I don’t really like this whole “gay marriage” push. Now, this doesn’t mean I will EVER vote against it. Anything that gets anyone more rights is good with me. But I don’t think “gay marriage” is the answer to this problem…I think that there is so much more to it than that.

Ok. Angry comments, trolls, and hate mail…commence in 3, 2, 1…

NOW!

-Essin’ Em

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Aug 13 2008

This Battle Has Been Won, But The War Far From Over!

I am overwhelmed with emotion and at a loss for words at the outpouring of support that people in our community have shown our family by donating prizes for the raffle, buying tickets, cross posting to spread the word, and the kind words that have gotten us through a very difficult time. We are proud to say that our personal need has been met and good (us, the sinners) triumphs over evil (them, the morally superior). To feed off of Graydancer’s post, we have proven that “a community proving that a community of pervs cares more about her education than an administration full of assholes.”

This means that instead of being my personal mission to fight for my daughter, I am on a bigger mission for the greater cause. I recognize that I am not the only person going through this battle. In fact, it’s a series of small battles that are all a part of a greater war on personal freedom, often with children in the crossfire.

This shouldn’t happen, but if you’re living an alternative lifestyle, it very well could happen to you. The only way to combat it is to put on the armor, link up arm-in-arm, and take them on as a commUNITY. That is exactly what I’ve seen in the last few days and I think we can do more!

The raffle continues, as it is scheduled to end on Sunday (8/17/08) at 10pm, but from this point forward, all proceeds will be going to the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom as a contribution from the community that has stood together and won this battle. This is our way of supporting the war that has been waged in the land of the free against personal and sexual freedom. At the end of the year, the refunded monies will also be donated on behalf of this community.

The National Coalition for Sexual Freedom is a national organization committed to creating a political, legal, and social environment in the United States that advances equal rights of consenting adults who practice forms of alternative sexual expression. NCSF is primarily focused on the rights of consenting adults in the SM-leather-fetish, swing, and polyamory communities, who often face discrimination because of their sexual expression.

My deepest gratitude to those who have supported and continue to support this cause. I have never felt such a sense of community in my entire life. So here is the current prize list for the new official National Coalition for Sexual Freedom raffle. Check back, as we seem to be adding prizes daily.

From Lochai there are three 5×7 museum signed prints from his recent exhibit at the World Erotic Art Museum, two of them are not only museum signed prints, but are also very limited editions.

Alley Bound and Curves are a limited edition of 10 museum signed prints. If you win, you will receive either 6/10 or 7/10. Beach Bound is Lochai’s iconic World’s Most Erotic Photograph winning piece, and is a signed museum print. (Sold normally at $75/print)

Ellie Lumpesse has donated three books:

The Straight Girl’s Guide to Sleeping With Chicks by Jen Sincero
Aqua Erotica by Mary Anne Mohanraj
The Ultimate Guide to Fellatio by Violet Blue

Ellie is also offering:

a 30-minute private phone session (that can include her amazingly sexy man) if you win.

Sam donated:

custom, hand made jewelry (a necklace and earring set) to a runner up. “It’s not a kinky prize, but pretty,” she said. Pretty indeed! Take a look: http://quem98.livejournal.com/306470.html

Thursday and D donated:

a signed 8×10 print of any one of their photographs
a copy of the book, The Mammoth Book of Illustrated Erotic Women.

And Thursday has also offered:

one of her sexy (orgasmic) voicemails to a lucky winner. Let me tell you, that is one hot prize.

The writer of Between My Sheets offered:

A brand new, still in the package, never been used Silver Bullet Vibe.

And just now I heard from my Naughty Secretary who offered:

Her services as a graphic designer. There are two separate prizes - each being two hours of graphic design time (normally charged at $120/hr). In addition to participating in this raffle, she is doing her own auction to raise money. She is sponsoring a silent auction of one of her paintings on her web page.

Edward, from Exjinn.net, the company that hosts all of our blogs and provides us without outstanding support and service, has offered:

A 50 gig hosting plan from Exjinn.net with 1-year of service.

Essin’ Em:

just donated a copy of the book, Wetter, with her story signed personally for you. As if that weren’t generous enough, she has also offered an 8×10 print!

Sabrina Fox - does the name ring a bell?

Sabrina Fox, as in the redhead hot as fuck bondage and fetish model, Sabrina Fox, was chatting with me today and mentioned that she has a few pairs of latex panties that she recently wore for a photoshoot that would offer as prizes. Latex panties worn by Sabrina Fox, anyone? Oh wait until I tell W about this when she is older.

Jeff Mach commented: (THANK YOU, JEFF!) [This is one of those prizes that I would like to know if you would like to be entered to win. If you're not in the area and can't use the tickets, then they would do you no good, but if you are in that area, then it's a great prize!]

I am running a New Year’s Eve fetish event in New Jersey at the end of this year (on NYE itself). I’ll offer a ticket (that is, admission for two people, including gourmet meal and champagne)

and

I run the Wicked Winter Renaissance Faire, now entering its fourth year, every February - again, in Jersey. We’re going to three days this year, and tickets for all three days would usually be at $40; I can donate two pairs of those, as well.

I feel like George from “It’s a Wonderful Life”. Graydancer, who posted a very insightful post about the society that we live in, just twittered me (it sounds dirtier than it is) and said:

I didn’t realize you were adding prizes. Throw in an audiobook version of my novel, “Nawashi“.

Rose Fox offered a very generous and naughty prize — a very good combination for this crowd!:

I used to review DVDs for AVN, and I’m still on Vivid’s mailing list, so now I have a closet full of unopened Vivid porn DVDs. I’ve been trying to figure out how to donate them someplace and would be delighted to offer them for your cause.

There are too many to catalog, so perhaps 10 “grab bags” of ten DVD’s? I’d do my best to include a varied selection so that the winner is fairly likely to get at least a few titles that suit their tastes.

(Just a note on this: because of the laws regarding the selling of pornography, the winners would need to submit a copy of their ID to Rose in order for her to be able to send them to you.)

Beautiful Rebecca has offered:

an original piece of sensual art from the artist. It was scheduled for a gallery show next year but we would much rather have it go to your cause as it hit home. It is 3×4 metal with an object representing a uterus called, “Oikos Cella”.

Alternatively, for those who win, but don’t feel that this art is right for their home, she is an interior designer and has offered to do a consultation for a room re-do. The details are kind of extensive, so I’ll discuss it with the winner personally.

Ms. Nikki Nefarious and AlteredAperture.com) has donated prints and a rope kit:

Collette for TABU Magazine 8 x 12
Jamie in Latex 8 x 12
Girl’s Best Friend 8 x 12
Scream 8 x 10
GarGirl Bound 8 x 10
The Enforcer 8 x 10
Sarah Sealed 8 x 10
Red Hood 8 x 10

and then A Starter Rope Package (4-pack of multi-colored ropes in different lengths and hemp rope cuffs)

Lily, who calls herself Lily (the rope ho) in her comment has donated

3 x 30ft hand-dyed, processed 6mm hemp kit

Radical Vixen, who most of you know as the editor of the weekly sex blog digest, Sugasm, is a very active political advocate. She has offered two books for the raffle:

She’s on Top: Erotic Stories of Female Dominance and Male Submission
Sex and Bacon: Why I Love Things That Are Very, Very Bad For Me

Thank you, so much! I cannot tell you how moved I am by the random kindness of the community. Lochai’s the one who started the commUNITY concept, but I get it better than ever now.

I’m officially re-launching the “Catalina’s Emergency Tuition Fund Raffle” as the “The Battle Is Won, But the War is Not Over” raffle with all remaining proceeds from this point forward going to NCSF.

Here is the link to buy your virtual ticket.

Tickets are $10.00 each, you can buy as many as you’d like (if you’d like to donate $50.00, for example, I’ll enter your name 5 times). You are not obligated to buy a virtual ticket. You can also just donate to a very worthy cause at any amount.

I really will write down names and put them in a hat, and my daughter can pick the winners. At this point, she is well-aware of what is going on. We’ll choose the winners on August 17th at 10 pm. You will be notified by 10:30 pm by email. Heck, we’ll even try to find someone to film it and show it to you all :)



Aug 12 2008

I’ve never asked for help before, but then again, nobody ever used my child as a pawn in a moral war before

Buy A Raffle Ticket To Win A Limited, Edition, Museum Signed Print From Lochai

I’ve never discussed this on my blog before, but recent developments have prompted me to discuss the reason why I’m no longer a teacher. Being Catalina isn’t always a good thing. I separated early this year with my school as a peaceful way to avoid a public scandal that would ultimately affect my teenage daughter, who attended said school.

Part of my agreement I cannot legally discuss - specifically the reasons and terms of my separation - but use your imaginations. I can say that I agreed to leave quietly and peacefully under the condition that my (straight-a’s, honors courses, award-winning, athlete, without a discipline record) child be allowed to attend her last year of middle school just as if I had resigned at the end of the year. Let me spell this out for you. Faculty receive a substantial tuition discount. I pay 10% of the tuition. This roughly amounts to $1,100. After leaving, all faculty are offered one more year for their children at the faculty tuition discount as a way to avoid disrupting their children’s lives too much.

A few days ago the head of my former school called me to tell me that had rescinded his offer and that she was no longer welcome to attend. In the same phone conversation, he changed his mind and decided to honor our agreement. Well, kind of. I came in with the tuition and they refused to accept my payment.

Later I received an email that stated that on top of the faculty tuition, I am also expected to pay student fees, which are not covered under the faculty discount. Okay, so throw in another $900. I can come up with that, even if it means the car payment doesn’t get paid.

The straw that broke this camel’s back? The additional $1,000 expense account that is being demanded by the 18th of August to cover her lunch account (which was roughly $750 last year) and field trip expenses (which are roughly $250). I requested that she not be allowed to charge a lunch in the cafeteria and that she will bring her lunch, which is an option available to (other) parents, to have this fee waived. The field trip charges, I can’t really object to, that seems fair, so mental tab up to $2,200.

I’ve just been informed that the school is unwilling to waive the expense account fee for her lunch account and demands the entire amount be paid. If it is unused it will be refunded to me at the end of the year. Nice of them to at least offer that. This brings up my new grand total to $3,200 in 8 days.

I went from having her tuition paid to being a mile away.

I have never been as upset as I am right now. For a “Christian” educator to use a child as a pawn in a moral battle against me, and what I represent, is unethical - it’s beyond unethical - it’s reprehensible.

So I’ve played all of my cards, my hands are tied. He wins right now. Because I have been judged a whore, my child loses.

I refuse to allow that to happen. For the first time ever, I am asking my readers to help me. I’ve asked my readers to support the arts (artists, photographers, and other bloggers) but never asked for financial support on my blogs for myself or my family. Today that changes because my child is involved. Today I ask for your support for my daughter’s education and future.

Similar to the project I did for Lochai, I am asking for donations towards my daughter’s education fund. I spoke to Lochai this afternoon, and he has offered to donate three 5×7 museum signed prints from his recent exhibit at the World Erotic Art Museum, two of them are not only museum signed prints, but are also very limited editions.

Alley Bound and Curves are a limited edition of 10 museum signed prints. If you win, you will receive either 6/10 or 7/10. Beach Bound is Lochai’s iconic World’s Most Erotic Photograph winning piece, and is a signed museum print. (Sold normally at $75/print)

On top of Lochai’s unbelievably generous offer, several people have contacted me since posting this and asked to donate items to be raffled off as well. Now, from Ellie Lumpesse we have three books:

The Straight Girl’s Guide to Sleeping With Chicks by Jen Sincero
Aqua Erotica by Mary Anne Mohanraj
The Ultimate Guide to Fellatio by Violet Blue

Ellie is also offering a 30-minute private phone session (that can include her amazingly sexy man) if you win.

And one of Janice’s friends left a comment in my blog that she would donate custom, hand made jewelry (a necklace and earring set) to a runner up.

“It’s not a kinky prize, but pretty,” she said. Pretty indeed! Take a look: http://quem98.livejournal.com/306470.html

Thursday and D have also offered a signed 8×10 print of any one of their photographs and a copy of the book, The Mammoth Book of Illustrated Erotic Women. And Thursday has also offered one of her sexy (orgasmic) voicemails to a lucky winner. Let me tell you, that is one hot prize.

Then I got an email from a total stranger, the writer of Between My Sheets, who offered:

A brand new, still in the package, never been used Silver Bullet Vibe.

And just now I heard from my Naughty Secretary who offered:

Her services as a graphic designer and artist. She is looking into which painting(s) she is going to donate, but she has committed to two separate prizes - each being two hours of graphic design time (normally charged at $120/hr).

Edward, from Exjinn.net, the company that hosts all of our blogs and provides us without outstanding support and service, has offered:

A 50 gig hosting plan from Exjinn.net with 1-year of service.

Thank you, so much! I cannot tell you how moved I am by the random kindness of the community. Lochai’s the one who started the commUNITY concept, but I get it better than ever now.

Essin’ Em, the pansexual feminist sexpert on her way up, just donated a copy of the book, Wetter, with her story signed personally for you. As if that weren’t generous enough, she has also offered an 8×10 print!

Sabrina Fox - does the name ring a bell?

Sabrina Fox, as in the redhead hot as fuck bondage and fetish model, Sabrina Fox, was chatting with me today and mentioned that she has a few pairs of latex panties that she recently wore for a photoshoot that would offer as prizes. Latex panties worn by Sabrina Fox, anyone? Oh wait until I tell W about this when she is older.

Jeff Mach commented: (THANK YOU, JEFF!)

Prize donations, a few: - I am running a New Year’s Eve fetish event in New Jersey at the end of this year (on NYE itself). Tickets are probably going to be something along the lines of $250 per couple - we were actually finalizing that this week. I’ll offer a ticket (that is, admission for two people, including gourmet meal and champagne) for the raffle, if you’d like.

and

I run the Wicked Winter Renaissance Faire, now entering its fourth year, every February - again, in Jersey. We’re going to three days this year, and tickets for all three days would usually be at $40; I can donate two pairs of those, as well, if it will assist you.

I feel like George from “It’s a Wonderful Life”. Graydancer, who posted a very insightful post about the society that we live in, just twittered me (it sounds dirtier than it is) and said:

I didn’t realize you were adding prizes. Throw in an audiobook version of my novel, “Nawashi“.

Thanks, Graydancer! I appreciate it! I didn’t know I was going to add prizes either, until people started offering. The outpouring of support in the various ways people have shown it is very moving. Some people can afford to show their support by purchasing a ticket, some people are supporting us by crossposting, some are offering prizes, some are doing all of the above and then some. I even consider it supportive just to see comments from people who happened upon it and have shown emotional support.

In the comments this morning, from a total stranger, Rose Fox, was this offer, which is generous and naughty — a very good combination for this crowd!:

I’m here via the person who donated the jewelry. I used to review DVDs for AVN, and I’m still on Vivid’s mailing list, so now I have a closet full of unopened Vivid porn DVDs. I’ve been trying to figure out how to donate them someplace and would be delighted to offer them for your cause.

There are too many to catalog, so perhaps 10 “grab bags” of ten DVD’s? I’d do my best to include a varied selection so that the winner is fairly likely to get at least a few titles that suit their tastes.

Thank you, Rose — I don’t know anybody, personally, who would turn down a handful of DVD’s. And you’re really giving away 10 prizes, not just one, so thank you x 10! You’re right, there’s got to be something in there that turns that key in the lock. (Just a note on this: because of the laws regarding the selling of pornography, the winners would need to submit a copy of their ID to Rose in order for her to be able to send them to you.)

Also in the comments this morning was a message from Beautiful Rebecca offering a piece of original sensual art:

I have an original piece of sensual art from the artist I live with I would like to donate. It was scheduled for a gallery show next year but we would much rather have it go to your cause as it hit home.

I believe most of my readers know Ms. Nikki Nefarious. She’s not only an award-winning rigger, but an award-winning photographer as well (http://alteredaperture.com). She is also a very close, personal friend of mine and although she is going through her own crisis after leaving her own job, she has offered to donate some of her prints as well as a rope kit. Here are the details:

Collette for TABU Magazine 8 x 12
Jamie in Latex 8 x 12
Girl’s Best Friend 8 x 12
Scream 8 x 10
GarGirl Bound 8 x 10
The Enforcer 8 x 10
Sarah Sealed 8 x 10
Red Hood 8 x 10

and then A Starter Rope Package (4-pack of multi-colored ropes in different lengths and hemp rope cuffs)

Lily, who calls herself Lily (the rope ho) in her comment below offered:

3 x 30ft hand-dyed, processed 6mm hemp kit to add to the prize box

Radical Vixen, who most of you know as the editor of the weekly sex blog digest, Sugasm, is a very active political advocate. She has offered two books for the raffle: (Thanks, Vix!!)

She’s on Top: Erotic Stories of Female Dominance and Male Submission
Sex and Bacon: Why I Love Things That Are Very, Very Bad For Me

I’m officially launching the “Catalina’s Emergency Tuition Fund Raffle”, here is the link to buy your virtual ticket. Tickets are $10.00 each, you can buy as many as you’d like (if you’d like to donate $50.00, for example, I’ll enter your name 5 times). I really will write down names and put them in a hat, and my daughter can pick the winners (of course I’ll come up with some vanilla reason why she’s doing it). We’ll choose the winners on August 17th at 10 pm. You will be notified by 10:30 pm.


**I wanted to mention that any money in excess of need will be donated to the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom. At the end of the year when this ridiculous expense account is refunded to me, I will also donate that money to the NCSF. This is more than one parent’s experience/nightmare. It’s the bigger cause that we are ultimately fighting for. If you’re not familiar with the mission of the NCSF, this is copied from their page:

The National Coalition for Sexual Freedom is a national organization committed to creating a political, legal, and social environment in the United States that advances equal rights of consenting adults who practice forms of alternative sexual expression. NCSF is primarily focused on the rights of consenting adults in the SM-leather-fetish, swing, and polyamory communities, who often face discrimination because of their sexual expression.

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