Nov 13 2008
Image of Catalina by AlteredAperture.com
Here’s another HNT for you — I’m on my way to NYC today for the Sex Blogger Calendar Launch Party. I hope to see you there tomorrow!! If you can’t make it, be sure to buy your copy. I’ve had a sneak peek and it’s absolutely divine!
Nov 12 2008
Tomorrow I leave for NYC for the 2009 Sex Blogger Calendar Launch Party and to hang out with some of the coolest women in the country for the weekend! I’m unbelievably excited. I’m going to somehow manage to get to Urban Gypsy’s office in Manhattan and then go home with her for our pre-party party with Beautiful Rebecca. I’m in Sapphic heaven!
As if it weren’t enough that I plan to snuggle up right between these ungodly sexy women, Tess has been teasing me with her Njoy Eleven. Since the moment I saw her review of the Njoy Eleven here on BestSexBloggers.com, I’ve wanted to try it out. See for yourself, and you’ll know why. Go ahead, click the review and it will open in a new window.
Now you may actually have thought to yourself, “Ick, you’re going to use someone else’s sex toys?” I thought that myself, and then Tess pointed out, “It’s stainless steel - easy to sterilize.” Oh, they are genius at Njoy! Now the question is, how do we turn it into a competition and what is the prize for she who can take the Eleven? Photographic evidence may be necessary.
I’ll let you know how it comes (ya, I know, but I had to).
Nov 11 2008
They are 12 of NYC’s sexiest women! They are the official pin-up girls of the 2009 Sex Blogger Calendar. Curious who is who? Have you ever wondered what some of our very own Best Sex Bloggers look like? I won’t give it away, but Em and Lo did! Click on the image to go to Em and Lo’s Daily Bedpost interview with our own Urban Gypsy and learn a little about these sultry sex vixens, but before you do, try to guess who is who. Your choices are:
Audacia Ray is a new media professional whose medium is sex. Over the past seven years, she has been a researcher and curator at the Museum of Sex, blogger for sites like Fleshbot and Naked City, author of the book Naked on the Internet, director of the award-winning porn film The Bi Apple, executive editor of $pread magazine, and adjunct professor at Rutgers University. She is also the vice president of Sex Work Awareness, the organization that will benefit from this calendar’s fundraising efforts. Her video podcast lives at LiveGirlReview.com and her blog WakingVixen turns five years old in 2009.
Desiree is a brainy, sexy, foodie, geeky, writer chick from New York who has always had an inclination toward the naughty. Sex is her absolute favorite topic of conversation and has been since way before she had any business conversing on the subject (starting at about age 2). She never backs down from a Scrabble challenge and once scored seventy six points with the word ‘clitoris’. She blogs about sex and culture and life at Baser Instincts
One fateful day, for better or worse, Diva, looking online for a momentary escape from her household chores, stumbled upon sex blogs. Her life hasn’t been the same since. Meeting up with a notoriously perverted blogger triggered a resurgence of sexuality frozen under layers of domesticity and monotony. She started Debauched Domestic Diva to record her new experiences and the conflicting emotions her weekly trips to New York City spurred. Writing her blog, slowly becoming a technical guru and being immersed in a new uber-cool circle of friends has given Diva the spark she was searching for that auspicious day.
Sociologist, blogger, and activist, Elizabeth Wood co-founded Sex In The Public Square as a place for academics, activists and people just plain interested in sex to talk about the intersections of sexuality and society. Dr. Wood writes about sex work, social justice, human rights, and is developing the idea of the “sex commons,” the space created by the increasing number of web sites and blogs where people can share sexual knowledge and expand sexual freedom.
Jamye Waxman, M.Ed is a writer, author, director, producer, host and sex-positive feminist. She is the former sex advice columnist for Playgirl Magazine, the author of “Getting Off: A Woman’s Guide to Masturbation” and the creator of the Personal Touch Video Series for Adam and Eve Pictures. Jamye has been dubbed the “nexxxt generation of sex educator” by wired.com and she is the President of Feminists for Free Expression.
Lux Alptraum serves as Editor of Fleshbot, Gawker Media’s blog about porn,sex, and the web, and Editor of Boinkology. Career highlights include founding and running That Strange Girl (the first altporn site to feature both male and female models), interning at Nerve, and keeping the masses educated about sex for the past ten years. Her writing has appeared in Time Out New York, Best Sex Writing 2008, and GOOD Magazine.
Having been trapped in a painfully awkward phase since, well, forever, with little more than one measly, anonymous kiss under her belt, Mariella’s gift to herself for that pivotal 21st birthday wasn’t the customary forty of Heineken, but the services of a professional pervert. With that pesky virginity thing taken care of, she served a brief stint in Nailing-Everything-That-Moves Land, but ultimately decided to dabble in debauchery on a significantly smaller scale. When she’s not getting lost in the subway or the swirling language of Faulkner, she’s stumbling blindly through basic human interaction, blogging every step of the way.
Rachel Kramer Bussel is a writer, editor, blogger, and reading series host. She has edited over 20 erotica anthologies, including Tasting Him, Tasting Her, Spanked, Rubber Sex, Dirty Girls, Crossdressing, and the non-fiction Best Sex Writing 2008 and 2009. She is Senior Editor at Penthouse Variations, hosts In The Flesh Reading Series, and is a former sex columnist for The Village Voice. She blogs at Lusty Lady and Cupcakes Take The Cake.
Marie “Riese” Lyn Bernard is a freelance video-maker, journalist, blogger, vlogger, fictionist, copywriter, essayist, re-capper, and aspiring cyber-performance artist based in New York City. She blogs at “This Girl Called Automatic Win” and recaps homo-sexy television at “Automatic Straddle” and for “The L Word Online.” Her work has appeared in Marie Claire, Curve, OurChart, Nerve.com, Clean Sheets and Conversely as well as books including The Bigger the Better, the Tighter the Sweater: 21 Funny Women On Beauty, Body Image, and Other Hazards of Being Female, Dirty Girls, Best Women’s Erotica 2005, Best American Erotica 2007 and the Lambda Literary Award-winning Erotic Interludes 2: Stolen Moments.
Sinclair Sexsmith is a chivalrous kinky writer, queer butch top, and feminist sex educator in New York City. He runs Sugarbutch Chronicles, a personal writing exploration of sex, gender, and relationships, and attempts to celebrate queer theory, sexuality, gender, and culture in ways that are expansive rather than restrictive, liberating rather than limiting. Mr. Sexsmith has degrees in both creative writing and gender studies, and his poetry and erotica has been published in various places, including Best Lesbian Erotica.
Tess may be a New Yorker but she’s really a gypsy at heart. Albeit a gypsy who sees herself frolicking through the forest clad in garments from the season Givenchy was high on the peasant aesthetic, nimbly avoiding stray branches and skipping over rivulets while kicking up her Prada brown suede stilettos. Tess is truly the embodiment of an Urban Gypsy, the title of the blog where she writes dark and moody D/s themed erotica, reviews sex toys, shows off her generous cleavage and generally reveals too much information. Several of Tess’ oh-so-wrong-but-oh-so-right fantasies are scheduled to be published in upcoming erotica anthologies.
Twanna A. Hines is a New York-based writer, editor, blogger and sexpot. Her dating commentary has been heard on NPR, and details about her rendezvous have been printed in Glamour magazine. She has written about sex, dating, relationships, men, pop culture and celebrities for Huffington Post, Lifetime, Nerve, Gen Art, Fast Company and others. AOL placed her site, FUNKYBROWNCHICK.com, on their Black Voices list of best blogs. Twanna’s sites have also been mentioned in New York magazine and online at Gawker Media, EbonyJet, Vibe and elsewhere. She speaks English and Dutch fluently. Get down with the funky brown at Funky Brown Chick.
So how did you do? Did you guess 10/12 correctly? 8/12? I’m curious, leave a comment, if you would! And remember, when you buy a calendar, not only do you get twelve months of pin-up sexy, you are actually helping to support the Sex Worker Awareness project that was founded by a group of sex workers and their allies who, after working with $pread Magazine for several years, saw a need for deeper support and advocacy than a magazine can offer. The organization was created around the core belief that all sex workers have a right to self-determination; to choose how they make a living and what they do with their bodies.j
It’s a win-win in my book! Something for me to put in my office and a way to contribute to my CommUNITY. If you’re in NYC on November 14th (that’s in just a few days!) then plan to make an appearance at the party. You can meet me (oh ya, and the pin-ups) and the first 100 to arrive have awesome gift bags. I know, because I’ve somehow volunteered to help put them together and there is some amazing stuff in there!
Nov 07 2008
I’m not the woman I used to be. Somewhere along the way I feel as if I have matured. Part of me thinks that I may have even chilled out a little bit when it comes to things that don’t make a difference in the big scheme of things.
Gone are the days that I jumped out of bed and made it immediately. No longer do I stress or flip out when there is laundry on the floor of the laundry room for more than a day. I’ve even relaxed enough to allow other people to load the dishwasher, clean the bathroom, and do the grocery shopping.
When I was first diagnosed and started treatments I tried valiantly to do it all. I made the meals, packed the lunches, cleaned the house, and tried like hell to be everything my husband and kids deserved. At the end of the night I was so exhausted that I couldn’t be bothered to walk up the stairs to go to bed. Still, I’d wake up and do it all again.
My husband and I would argue because I wouldn’t let him do anything. He struggled with watching the woman he loved pushing herself beyond her limits and I struggled to be the wife I thought he wanted and needed. It took a major argument and pneumonia for me to let go and let someone else.
In the six weeks that he has been home with me we’ve argued only twice. I really thought that we’d kill one another by the time a week had passed but he was convinced that this was just what we both needed. He knew better than I what a difference it would make for both of us as individuals and as a couple.
Oh, we still bicker. He tells me when I’m being a bitch. I tell him when he’s being an insensitive asshole. There are times when I’m sure we both could use a break but we hang in there. By the time the smoke clears we’re laughing like loons and enjoying one another once more.
He wants to do more. I curl up under the blankets and allow him. If I need a soda he brings me one. If I am sick he checks on me and helps me back to my chair. If I’m hungry but nothing in the house sounds appetizing (and we have two or three dollars) then he volunteers to run and get fries and sweet tea from McDonald’s so that I have something in my system.
Our routine is simple, relaxed. We get up at the same time and head downstairs. He logs in and gets ready for work. I curl up in my comfortable chair and put my feet on the ottoman. He tucks my blankets in around me and brings me whatever I need before he heads back to his desk to work.
At some point during the day he helps me shower. I wash my hair and he washes my body. Then he washes himself before helping me out. He escorts me into the living room where my clothes are waiting for me before he heads back to his desk. (Showering and dressing seem to be the biggest energy drains for me but showering feels so good!) I dress slowly, piece of clothing by piece of clothing, then wait for him to help me back to my chair. If his schedule allows for it, we nap together. Otherwise, I sleep in my chair.
The days are the same. His love is the same. I thank him for taking care of me and he tells me that he loves taking care of me.
I never imagined finding a love like this. Someone who makes me laugh and smile is also the person who looks out for me, protects me. The person who drives me the most insane is the person I can’t imagine being without.
The man who kisses me gently in the morning is the same man that makes sweet passionate love to me at night. The man who is my warden is also my protector, my champion, and my guardian. The man who made me his wife has made me his life.
I’m convinced that when faced with a love like ours, cancer doesn’t stand a chance.
Nov 03 2008
Whether you’re vanilla or kinky, if you’ve spent any time in my company within the past month, you’ve probably heard me mention Liberator. I’ve been intrigued ever since I saw their products on Catalina’s blog.
The wonderful people at Liberator were nice enough to let me try out one of their Black Label Wedge/Ramp Combos. The regular Wedge/Ramp Combo is pretty damn cool all by itself - it consists of two separate pieces, the Wedge and the Ramp. But the Black Label Wedge/Ramp Combo takes things to an even kinkier level! These covers can be paired with Liberator’s ankle, wrist, and thigh cuffs which will securely snap into tie points strategically placed all over both pieces’ covers. Imagine securing your partner in place, ass perfectly placed in the air for whatever your wicked mind can devise! Liberator’s Black Label products allow you to turn your ordinary everyday bedroom into a sexual playground. Already have the Shapes, but want to try things a little kinkier? There’s always the conversion kits…
Right out of the box, we were impressed. The Shapes were as lightweight as foam, but much more substantial - able to support our combined weight, but easy to pick up and moved around. Each Shape comes in zipped inside a lightweight nylon shell with a handy carrying strap. But what lies beneath is simply amazing. A velvety black cover with straps and buckles attached to each corner, so decadently soft and sensual against naked skin, all over an impermeable skin that keeps lubes, lotions and oils out. And if your velvety cover gets dirty, just unzip it and throw it in the washing machine. Follow the directions for washing and drying, and your cover will come out even softer and ready for more action! And imagine cuffs and a blindfold in the same velvety soft material.
My husband, D likes to describe the Shapes as sexual Legos for adults. We’ve tried various configurations, with me on top, with him on top, with my legs tied in place over my legs with my hips tipped up and open to him, with his legs spread wide and his ass in the air for me. I honestly cannot imagine having sex without them. Imagine your favorite position - for me, it’s on my knees being taken from behind - doggy style. Before, it seemed inevitable that one of us would give out before we were both satisfied. My knees would give out, or his back would start hurting, and we wouldn’t be able to finish things off in our favorite position. But with the Liberator Shapes, you’re held perfectly in place, with no additional stress placed on your body. D has a variety of back and neck problems, but he’s found that the Liberator Shapes reduce the stress on his back and cause him less pain. Because really…sex shouldn’t hurt, unless you want it to. ;)
I highly recommend Liberator products - they are high quality throughout, and even though they are expensive, they are worth every penny. I see people spending little bits of money here and there on toys and rope and other things to make their sex lives more interesting. True, Liberator products are an investment, but they are an investment worth every penny because they will change your sex life forever. I already know I’ll be investing in other covers for my shapes - definitely another set of Black Label ones, but maybe a regular set too, in a fun color like red or purple. And I know I want some thigh cuffs…hmmm, spread cuffed thighs - so hot, and my imagination is already running wild thinking about the possibilities! Not sure you have room for the Shapes, why not check out the Liberator Fascinator Throes - they’re on my Christmas list this year!
Mmmmm, thank you, Liberator, for opening my mind to the possibilities!
Oct 31 2008
We’re on the eighth part of Life. Love. Cancer. It seems odd to say it, but I’m kind of sad that we’re at this part already. Writing these posts has helped me in ways I hadn’t even realized.
They have been challenging but in a good way. Many times I have struggled and wondered where I would go with each installment, often to the point of tears. Now I realize that the tears weren’t tears of frustration, but my way of coming to terms with my diagnosis.
I believed I had dealt with all of it. In my heart of hearts I didn’t think there was anything left to confront. Well, anything short of death itself. I see now that I still had a lot of anger and frustration to work out. Writing this series has helped me to find a sort of internal peace that works well with my determination to not give up hope.
Before all of this, hope was just a word on a page. With every appointment, every scan, I sank deeper into the acceptance. I wrote letters and planned holidays that were over the top. Plans that I never had the energy to carry out, but the plans were there just the same. I focused all my energies on the end because that’s what I was told to do.
But it wasn’t me. I hated the feeling of waking up every day and going through the motions. I wasn’t living. I was waiting to die.
Waiting.
To die.
I started blogging about all the things that were happening and the response was overwhelming. People left comments and sent positive thoughts my way. They sent emails and offered encouragement. Perfect strangers brought to life a small glimmer of hope.
Today I write this and I know that I have made peace with the fact that I might die. I might die. My oncologists and varied physicians aren’t God. They do what they know to do in the best way they know how to do it. They give facts based on tests and labs and co-morbidities. I know the odds are against me. I know I might die.
The thing is, I also might live.
All the prayers, all the words of encouragement, and all the healing vibes might be just the thing to lead me to a miracle. I know that I don’t deserve one more than anyone else. There is nothing extraordinary about me that sets me apart from all the other people in the world who are fighting for their lives. I’m a girl in a world full of sadness and strife, in a world full of struggle and unfairness.
Am I wrong to hope? Is it selfish of me to watch my little girls and hope against all hope that I will beat the odds, that I’ll be there when they grow up? Maybe so; but holding them close and listening to them laugh only fuels the fire, the will and the desire to come through this on the other side.
Oct 30 2008
Crossposted from our Blog - http://liljgrrlanddaddy.com - lil*j’s perspective
Saturday morning I woke up after D had been awake awhile. He brought me coffee and after a few sips to wipe the cobwebs away, I slid down and gave him an amazing cock sucking. He filled my mouth with cum, then had me play with myself until I came. Then we were off and running. We hosted the meeting this month so I had some last minute clean to do. I didn’t have much because the boys had done a good deal of it on Friday. But I did have some things to get done.People started arriving at about 1 o’clock. As always, it was a great day of hanging with wonderful people who are kinky rope peeps. We had a blast. The topic was tying the male form, VanDarkHolm style. Kat tied on he bob. So we didn’t have to teach for once. So we got to enjoy ourselves in a relaxing way. Then people broke off and had some snacks. Then there was tying going on. Some women tying on males. We had some newbies, so D taught them some harnesses and we covered some safety stuff. Then the official meeting ended and our “after party” began. There was lots of beatings and tying and all sorts of juicy stuff going on. Our t showed up late as she had to work. One thing I forgot is that D’s brother was there for the meeting and the “after party”. He seemed to be enjoying himself. He was joking right along with everyone and cracking wise. I think he learned some things. Our t was sick with a cold so we promised her we would take it easy on her.
D was in the zone. He suspended a newbie after we went over chest harnesses. Then he inverted Kat’s bob. Then we practiced our routine. D’s bro helped us problem solve and we think we got it figured out now. So I was able to stay up for a long time and we worked on some of the meat of the routine. Then D has been wanting to do an inversion on a bamboo pole with the bottom in the splits. Since I cannot do splits, t was the model because she can. So her first inversion was doing the splits on bamboo. It was hot. D did an incredible job with the rigging so she was able to stay up for quite a long time. That was pretty much enough for the night. It was a long day and D was exhausted by this time. He was crashing from his rigger high.
But we needed to make sure t was taken care of. So after everyone had left, we asked her if she would like an orgasm. She has been on orgasm denial for awhile but with her being sick, we wanted to offer her the choice. She, at first said something like, “well, if your too tired, that’s ok”. D quickly corrected her and repeated the question. She said she would like an orgasm. So D told me to get her clothes off and work on her slave positions. So I did that while he was getting some things. I took her through them one by one and just added a little bit of improvements here and there. Overall, she did quite well. Then we added two new Gorean positions. Then D blindfolded her and started teasing her with a vibe. We got out a dildo (my favorite) and D used that one her while I teased her clit with the vibe. She was ready to cum in no time. She seemed to really enjoy her orgasm. She was pretty much gone after that. But I got out some Tiger Balm and rubbed it on her chest. I then did a sinus release and we played with her energy a bit. D was at her bottom charkas and I was at her top. She was jerking off the floor. Then we sent her off to bed.
We went to bed and D started teasing my pussy with his tongue. He liked my pussy slowly and softly until he climbed on top of me and fucked me slow and deep. We both came together then we were off to dreamland.
Namaste, j
Oct 28 2008
Click the Heart To Help The Butterfly Temptress
Never fear! I have more toys to review and report on, in fact I was planning to write about the We-Vibe today, which has an interesting twist to it, but I postponed it until next week to talk about VibeReview.com and The Butterfly Temptress Cancer Fund.
You see, recently it came to my attention that one of my friends was about to be cut off of her cancer treatments and pain management program because of she falls into that gap of making too much for the government to help and not making enough/underinsured to pay the medical bills that are pouring in as a result of chemotherapy and radiation treatment for her stage IV cervical cancer that has spread throughout her system. The thought of denying treatment and pain medication to a human being diagnosed with cancer is so incomprehensible to me - it’s inhumane. What kind of a country do we live in?!
Her only choice is to turn to her CommUNITY, my CommUNITY, your CommUNITY for help. Times are tough though and even people who want to donate don’t have it. I’m one of them. You might be, too. You can still help, though!
I contacted my friends at VibeReview.com to see if there was any way that they could help. They are a small company, but were just as impassioned as I was to do what they could do. On top of a financial sponsorship for part of the series, Life.Love.Cancer, on BestSexBloggers.com, VibeReview has agreed to allow affiliates to join in the fight. Now VibeReview.com affiliates can choose to donate their November commissions to The Butterfly Temptress Cancer Fund. VibeReview.com has agreed to double the amount and donate it to The Butterfly Temptress Cancer Fund.
If you are already a VibeReview.com affiliate, simply check the box on the registration page and VibeReview will take care of the rest. If you are not a VibeReview.com affiliate and you’d like to help, please do sign up. It’s fast, it’s easy, making links is as simple as click, copy, paste, and heck, after the fundraiser you could earn 20% of anything someone buys as a result of clicking from your link. It’s not going to feed your family, necessarily, but it will add up and you can buy that fabulous pair of shoes you know you want but would never buy unless you had extra money.
I encourage you to get involved - in any way you can - spread the word, join up, click the box, and make a real difference. It’s something we all say we want to do - now is the time to do it. We can make a difference. If you in a position to donate money directly to the Butterfly Temptress Cancer Fund, you can do so directly through her paypal link on my page or on TheButterflyTemptress.com.
Special Thanks to VibeReview.com for choosing compassion over profit. They truly are my first choice when it comes to online toy stores. I’ve worked with them all, and while some are good, there is a reason I exclusively promote VibeReview.com and this solidifies that exclusive relationship I have with them. When I say Catalina loves VibeReview.com, I’m 100% sincere.
Oct 27 2008
Editor’s Note: This is part of a ten-part series written by The Butterfly Temptress.
For information on how you can help, please the introductory post or go directly to the http://thebutterflytemptress.com.
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part 1
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part II
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part III
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part IV
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part V
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part VI
I don’t think that anyone can ever explain what happens to a person when they stand toe to toe with a terminal diagnosis. Unless you have been there and experienced it, there’s no way you can help someone else to understand. Yet, people ask all the time.
They want to know what it’s like to do something knowing it may or may not be the last time. They want to know how it changed your relationships with those you love. They ask if it feels weird to have sex knowing that you’re probably only going to be having sex for a little while longer.
I try to be understanding. I answer their questions to the best of my ability and I try to do it nicely. Especially when I know that they have read my blog, because they feel like they know me after reading my stuff for almost three years. I figure that I owe them a little common courtesy.
What no one realizes is that the entire cancer thing is completely subjective. My experience with it isn’t like anyone else’s. My thoughts and emotions might not sync with their grandmothers experience or their sisters experience.
Still, it’s sometimes easier to answer their questions than to answer the ones that they left unasked.
The questions just hang in the air. They want to know about HPV. They want to know if I ended up with HPV which led to cervical cancer because I was a slut (I wasn’t - Sperm Donor had it and passed it onto me while the repeated rapes and abuse were occurring).
They want to know if they will one day be like me.
And I can’t answer that question for them.
There are too many variables; too many unknowns. I’m not a doctor. I don’t have the answers and I certainly am not in any place to offer any sort of reassurance.
So I tell them to see a doctor. Even if they’ve never had unprotected sex, ask for a full work-up. I remind them that they are their best advocate. If they don’t find the answers they’re looking for, go elsewhere. Doctors are human too.
If I’d argued with every gynecologist that told me that the results of my Pap smear were abnormal. If I’d made them read the family history section of my records. If I’d told them sooner that I was sexually abused repeatedly as a child. If I’d remained steadfast in my insistence that my age didn’t mean I was exempt from developing cancer.
If I would have taken my own advice, I might not be fighting for my life.
Oct 25 2008
Crossposted from our Blog - http://liljgrrlanddaddy.com - Nawa*G’s perspective
That is the line I heard from my little girl Monday night after we got to our bedroom. Long Days at work and giving lots of energy takes its toll for sure. But my little girl is a slut…my whore and really I know better than to believe that line. But let me start at the beginning of the evening.
Monday was one of her long days at work. Many people to work with and no time at all to even think! I too was busy as my brother and I went out into the woods to cut and hall two trailer fulls of wood for a new outdoor woodburner for our place. The Rope Ranch goes Green! But cutting, hauling and stacking wood is also tough work so we were tired and sore as well. We had a vice dinner them my brother decided it was time for a Guitar Hero battle. So for two hours we did just that!
We got back to the bedroom around 9:45 I think, I sat in my chair and had her kneel at my feet. She needed some time on the floor at my feet to center herself and connect with her submissive little girl! After a few minutes she was told to get her Hitachi out and kneel up in front of me. She kept saying she was “not feeling very sexual” as I just grinned at her. As I sat from my chair looking down at her, her pretty eyes were cast up looking to me for direction and she was told to turn it on and use it on herself. She did just that from her kneel up position. I told her to kneel down and relax and enjoy the ride. In no time my little slut was begging to cum.
I love this position! I am sitting up, her kneeling at my feet with one of the most powerful orgasm producing toys we own, forced to use it on herself, and then not allowed to cum till I allow it. Such control, such power…It is a huge turn on for me as well as her. So for a girl “not feeling sexual” and “not feeling it tonight,” she certainly was moaning, grinding and her face contorting. It was very hot to watch her erotic torture from the comfort of my chair. She was at that edge and at this point feeling very sexual. With a little laugh I told her to cum. Her screams internal as to not disturb my brother in the next room, she started shaking and really grinding that Hitachi into her pussy. Waves and waves of orgasmic bliss covered her body from her tore, to her clit, to her nipples to her face. Her entire body was in this one!
After a minute to recover she was taken to the bed. My cock was hard and needing to use her pussy. I put her on all fours and took her from behind. A long, deep, penetrating fuck. The kind you slowly slid into her, then pull totally out, then plow into her again fast and hard. I love varying the pace and depth in her. Her reactions and responses are so perfect and so beautiful. I told her to cum again, she did and i filled that sweet pussy with my cum. We collapsed onto the bed and enjoyed some naked time, body to body together. My arms were wrapped around her in a spoon position. My cock still throbbing. She loves this position as it makes her feel safe, secure, loved and owned. I guess she was sexual after all!
Peace, G
Oct 24 2008
This is my inaugural HNT participatory toodleoo, and so, um yeah. Boob.
Greetings!
I am tickled plum (I can’t be tickled pink. The whole melanin thing, you see) to be here on the sextacular that is bestsexbloggers.com!
I’m Mollena, Performer, Writer, Executive Pervert, BDSM Educator, and all around fucking freak.
My blog, The Perverted Negress, is the (un)natural distillation of my ongoing blogging on ALT.com, and my ramblings and noodling on LiveJournal. I wanted to have a place where I could fly the freak flag, tell my life’s stories, gossip about pervy delectables, and rail and rant freely.
Deepest gratitude to Catalina for her invitation, and for this site. I look forward to promulgating perversion!
Peace.
~Mollena
Oct 23 2008
Editor’s Note: This is part of a ten-part series written by The Butterfly Temptress.
For information on how you can help, please the introductory post or go directly to the http://thebutterflytemptress.com.
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part 1
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part II
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part III
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part IV
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part V
I wrote it but it seems kind of silly. Still, it came from the heart, so I wanted to share it with those of you who are following Life. Love. Cancer.
Dear Cancer,
Let me begin by saying that I know that writing this will likely do absolutely nothing. I acknowledge that this is an exercise in futility. Still, I’d be lying if I said it didn’t feel damn good to be doing it anyway.
For far too long now you have had the power. You have invaded my space, my brain and my body. I’m not okay with that any more than I was okay with my biological father raping and abusing me for years. I am an independent woman with a life. I have no time nor any use for the things that you bring to the table.
I know you’re a stubborn bastard, or maybe you’re just a lazy bitch who refuses to leave because there isn’t a better gig elsewhere. However, I have news for you. This is MY life; this is MY body. I don’t want you here. I never did. No doubt this is all a little harsh to you, but if you’ll hear me out, I’m sure you will understand where I’m coming from.
You see, I’m a mother. I have two absolutely gorgeous little girls who need their Mama. You know the ones I’m talking about. Gorgeous with impish smiles and tinkling laughter that the angels themselves envy? Yeah. Those girls.
They need me. Maybe they don’t realize it yet. Maybe they don’t think they do right now but as their mother, I know that will change. And when it does, I fully expect to be here for them.
I’m also a wife. Finally, after all this time, he married me. He loves me. Sure, he’s a man and he has man tendencies but he’s MY man and he loves ME. Where I come from, that means something.
I love being married to him. For me, it’s the best thing going. No one loves me like he does. While this whole terminal routine seems to work for you, it doesn’t work for me. I don’t like it because it threatens my relationship with him. I’m not ready to have that be over yet.
So here is what I suggest-
Chemo. A whole lot of chemo. Maybe some radiation. Nuclear warfare developed just for you. I’ve asked nicely, so really, you have left me with no other choice.
I’d like to say that I’m sorry it had to end this way but I’m not. So, leave quietly. Pack what you can now because you won’t ever be welcome here again. Are we clear?
Good.
I’ll see you in remission.
Without apology,
The Butterfly Temptress
Oct 22 2008
Editor’s Note: This is part of a ten-part series written by The Butterfly Temptress.
For information on how you can help, please the introductory post or go directly to the http://thebutterflytemptress.com.
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part 1
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part II
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part III
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part IV
I’m more in love with my husband now than I ever was before. I probably didn’t know or understand just what love really was until the oncologists told me that I might not have it. I was a stupid girl living in a make-believe world, full of romance novel misunderstandings and real world consequences.
Along with being in love with my husband, I find that my attraction to him has grown to gargantuan proportions. He smiles and I see his rakish charm. He laughs and I feel that tingle somewhere deep inside. He reaches out to caress my skin or hold my face in his hands and I am taken to a place most women only dream of being with their husbands.
I know that I’m one of the lucky ones. My husband is faithful and he is strong. My husband is gentle and sweet. He is everything I waited to find. Is it any wonder that being near him, being loved by him, makes me yearn for his touch?
Sometimes we just can’t. The day has been too long and the pain is just too much. The desire is there but the energy is not. On those nights we snuggle close, skin on skin, buried beneath the comforter in our perfectly sized bed. We talk and we laugh most days. Other days, we cry. With our arms wrapped tightly and our toes tangled ever so slightly.
Then there are the times that we can’t get enough. A look across the room, a smile or a wink is all it takes to urge us on. In our bedroom, the living room, or maybe in the shower as the water begins to turn cold. The where or the why doesn’t matter as much as the when, as much as the fact that right then we need to be one, without a thought to anything other than one another.
Cancer is cruelest to those who need their families and to those in love. Who will be there to hold the hand of the man who stole my heart? Who will be there to fix his dinner, to remember his birthday, or make sweet passionate oral love to him at the end of a long work day? I can’t help but cry when it plays out in my mind.
Who will hold him close and cherish him the way I do? Who will see through his bark and beyond his bite to know that he’s hurting and in need of a hug? That’s my job, that’s what I’m here for. Cancer doesn’t listen when I scream and cry, when I try to make it understand that I’m not finished yet.
By now I know that the best thing to do would be to let him go. I should encourage him to find someone now, to help make the transition easier. Instead, I’m more selfish than ever. I want him all to myself for as long as I have left. I want his hugs and kisses, his touches and his orgasms to be mine and mine alone.
I just want everything that is him to be wrapped up in everything that is us until the end of my time.
Oct 22 2008
With so much focus lately on “going green”, many of us have started to look for more earth-friendly alternatives, even in our sexual play. The wonderful folks over at Babeland have taken the entire eco-friendly thing one step further with their Eco Delight Kit - and I was thrilled to be able to try it out and help the Earth at the same time.
The coolest part of the Eco Delight Kit for me was the packaging it arrives in! The gift bag, which is made from recycled paper, is also studded with wildflower seeds so you can plant the entire thing and flowers will grow - seriously, how cool is that?! I cannot wait for warmer weather to come back so I can plant mine!
The Eco Delight Kit contains a Fun Factory Delight vibrator - more on this S-shaped wonder in a bit, a bottle of vegan friendly Babeland Naturals Organic Lube, a soy-based massage candle in a sweet rice flower scent, and all natural vegan friendly Mamba condoms - made by a Swedish non-profit group!
I’m a huge fan of wax play and massage, but massage candles were new and unfamiliar territory for me. I wasn’t really sure what to expect, but I was happy to discover that the soft liquidy wax dripped on for warm and sensual play, but could be rubbed right into the skin to enhance the sensation with massage. The rice flower scent was light and neutral enough that my husband didn’t complain about the smell being “too girly”. I have to say that I’m a convert - I’ve actually started shopping for other soy-based massage candles because I love the additional sensation that comes from rubbing the wax into the skin.
The Babeland Organic Lube proved to be less popular with us - D couldn’t use it at all because it contains aloe vera, which he is severely allergic to, so I had to test it out solo. It was a little thicker than I expected, and smelled a little weird, but worked out okay, if not a little gummy. I think I personally prefer thinner silkier lubes, but if you’re a fan of thick lubes, you might want to try it.
Since D and I don’t really play with anyone else right now, we don’t usually use condoms, so we weren’t really sure if we would want to test them out. But after a few moments of watching me try out the Babeland Organic Lube, D couldn’t keep his hands off me, and decided to don a Mambacondom to protect himself from the lube. Neither of us really likes condoms, but of all the condoms that we’ve tried, the Mamba condoms were some of the best. They didn’t smell funny, and they were thin enough that we didn’t lose a lot of sensation. We’ve decided to get some more, so that when we do play with other people, we’ll have some nicer condoms on hand.
The highlight of the kit, though, for me, was the Fun Factory Delight vibrator - I got the pink. I have loved every single Fun Factory toy that I’ve tried, so I had high hopes for the Delight. And it did not disappoint me - the soft combination of shiny plastic and silky silicone were pleasant to both the eye and the touch. It comes with a small rectangular case which not only stores the vibrator, but also recharges it. After charging it up for a few hours, it was ready to go, and so was I. Using the Delight has actually made me wonder why more vibrators aren’t like it - not only is it environmentally friendly by being rechargable, but the S-curve shape is ergonomic! This was the first vibrator that I’ve ever used that was comfortable to use on myself. Usually I end up breaking my wrist trying to bend and twist a vibrator, but with the Delight, I could just hook my fingers into one end of the curve while the other end fit inside me perfectly. Even D was impressed with it - he tied me down to the bed, and fit it inside me, and was able to leave it there while he went about other means and methods of teasing and tormenting me.
And it feels amazing. I’m a fan of strong vibrations, and so, I can rarely find a vibrator strong enough to satisfy me clitorally. But the Delight’s 30+ settings (that’s right - it was 32 settings) run from barely there to exactly where I like it and then some, so I was able to find a setting perfectly right for me.
I like to use toy cleaning wipes on toys like these for convenience, but it also cleans up easily with antibacterial soap and water. Since it’s not 100% silicone, it can’t be sterilized by boiling, so this is a toy where everyone will need one of their own.
So, all in all, I think the Eco Delight Kit proves that you can be sexy, have tons of fun in the bedroom, and still be earth-friendly! And don’t orgasms feel that much better when you know you’re helping the environment!
Oct 21 2008
Editor’s Note: This is part of a ten-part series written by The Butterfly Temptress.
For information on how you can help, please the introductory post or go directly to the http://thebutterflytemptress.com.
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part 1
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part II
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part III
I can’t even begin to tell you what it feels like. They deliver the news like it’s no big deal, like it happens every single day. Their eyes won’t meet yours and they glance at the clock above your head or clear the reminders from their pagers.
All you can do is watch your body from above and try to decipher the words. It’s like they’re trying to talk to you while you’re underwater in a swimming pool. You know, it’s warbled, a little muted and you want to hold up your finger to motion for them to give you just one minute to come up for air.
Except that there is no coming up. Your chest heaves and you begin to cry silent tears. There is no air to be had. Your nose runs and there are rivers of mascara on your cheeks. Later you will look in the mirror and ask yourself why you bothered to wear it at all.
Even now, that’s how it feels. Like it’s happening to someone else. Almost like I’m watching a made for television movie except the main character looks a whole lot like the fat me that I see in the mirror.
The hardest part of the entire process is the internal mental dialogue. You ask yourself a million times if you’ve thought it all out. Did you make the appointments for the radiation? Did you schedule chemo for the days when the kids had school? Did you remember to tell those kids that you love them even when they’re mouthy?
You smile at everyone whether you feel like it or not. You hold your nearly bald head high when you tell the old ladies of the hospital auxiliary that you’re doing fine, getting better every day. Then you tell yourself that you could always find the next Dr. Kevorkian because at least then you would die with at least a trace amount of dignity. All the while, you smile that thousand watt smile that your husband says is the one he knows isn’t real.
It’s not always self-pity. Sometimes you’re just downright pissed off; at the doctor, at your husband, at the nurse who holds the bags of chemo. You want to scream and pull the IV out of your arm like your former patients used to do all the time. You want to ask the clergy who prays for you why God decided that this was your cross to bear.
Friends don’t know what to say, so they stop calling or emailing. Family members don’t visit and gossip among themselves about how they think you’re doing. You can rely on your husband and your mother, but you hate to because they just look so damn tired.
It’s an emotional high wire act that can go wrong at any moment. Which mask is it today, the happy but in pain or the honest and unbearable? My husband says it’s a roll of the dice and he’s right; except I’m usually not the one rolling them because cancer has already done that for me.
Luckily, I do have my writing. When the world is a mess and my emotions are jumbled, I can sit down and blog. I am lucky to have met some great people through my blog and through other things I have written, so I try to let that be my focus.
Someone out there has it much worse than I do. This week someone has already lost a lover, buried a child, or been diagnosed with HIV. Someone in a country far away doesn’t have enough food to eat or money to pay the rent. Others have no jobs and no idea if they will survive another night with an abusive spouse.
When I look at the big picture, I’m ashamed of myself. For as much as it seems has been taken away, I have been given so much. My children are healthy. My husband still has his job. My mother and father love me. I can laugh, smile, and breathe.
Oct 20 2008
Happy New Toy Tuesday. Today instead of review something I’ve got here, I wanted to review VibeReview.com itself. We (bloggers) tend to test and report on a lot of products. We are asked to put our names with a company and expect that what we say is going to be backed up by the store we are representing. We are literally signing our name to it like a presidential campaign, “I am Catalina and I approve this message.” By the way, I posted this originally at Catalina Loves.com. It is reflective only of my opinion.
There’s been a lot of talk lately about the blogging review and affiliate program. Some people have been on the fence about which company we should get behind. My nomination and vote goes for VibeReview.com.
No, I don’t get paid to write my reviews from VibeReview.com - guess what? I don’t work for them in any capacity. That frees me up to say that I don’t like a product if I don’t like it. I can write my review to my specs. I don’t have to include any hoaky text, there are no real demands on my review other than test it, write about it, link to it. I choose to be an affiliate, so it works out that if you buy that product through my sites because I recommended it, then great, I get a 20% commission. Don’t plan on making a living this way, but it adds up and you can buy a nice pair of shoes!
If you haven’t noticed, aside from Liberator.com, the only sex toy store I represent is VibeReview.com. I choose to link my brands, Catalina Loves and Best Sex Bloggers.com, with theirs. Why am I so loyal and why is it that I love VibeReview.com and recommend it to other bloggers, and in particular to consumers? Because they have never once been anything but honest and genuine with me. Integrity goes a long way. I feel loyal to them because they are the little guy. They are scrappy. They want business and they provide better customer service than anywhere else I’ve seen. You know how it is - big companies aren’t too concerned about you unless you’re bringing in serious affiliate money.
Look at your choices. VibeReview.com is a fantastic company. Their commitment to the Blogger CommUNITY is so strong that though we haven’t worked out the details, they are willing to help sponsor the Butterfly Temptress Cancer Fund after another toy store (the sex shop I do not trust) rescinded their offer. All with just a phone call from me. No, it’s not that I’m amighty and powerful (well, I am kinda) but that their human compassion outweighs a net loss of income. That’s a company I want to do business with!
Oct 20 2008
Editor’s Note: This is part of a ten-part series written by The Butterfly Temptress.
For information on how you can help, please the introductory post or go directly to the http://thebutterflytemptress.com.
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part 1
Click to read Life.Love.Cancer: Part II
Long before the diagnosis, long before the seizures and the struggles within my marriage, cancer had completely taken my body over. I was tired and lethargic. I’d gone from working hours upon hours as a nurse to being unable to fix a full meal for our family. Exhaustion had taken hold.
As with many female issues, a common first sign of trouble is bleeding during or after intercourse. It was definitely the case with me, but one day it started and it never stopped. Week after week, pad after pad, I bled. After six weeks I scheduled an appointment with my family physician who promptly referred me to a gynecologist.
My first exam was impossible to do because the bleeding was so bad. The doctor told me that he wanted to prescribe birth control pills for six weeks just to see if they made a difference. So I sucked down a pill every single day for six weeks and went through a super-size packs of sanitary napkins weekly. Still, I bled.
My next appointment came and he said that he was going to try to do an exam, even though the bleeding was profuse. So I endured what had to be one of the most painful exams ever. While he was doing the exam he also decided to do a biopsy, just in case. When I left, I left with a handful of pamphlets and lots of questions.
Ultimately, the tests came back and they did some minor surgeries. We thought that was it. Just some abnormal cells, nothing to be worried about. Life goes on.
Except it didn’t. The bleeding got worse. My skin looked like that of a person who had been dead and embalmed and even felt that way.
Add all of that to the fact that I am fat and well, I guess it comes as no surprise that sex wasn’t happening. I didn’t even want it. My husband didn’t ask for it, I didn’t ask for it, so we just kept floating along, content to have yet one more item off our checklist.
My body had betrayed me. That was what I felt. Instead of working through it, I began to feel sorry for myself. I got out of bed long enough to do the basics, like see the kids off to school and fix dinner. I had no desire to do anything other than that, so I didn’t.
The turning point came only after the diagnosis was made. They had started chemo and radiation and over time the bleeding slowed. Thanks to injections and specific dietary guidelines I was able to regain some energy. I was fat but at l