I blame njoy for my masturbation session in TJ Maxx’s parking lot in broad daylight. You see, after Greg gifted me with a Pure Plug 2.0, a butt plug that can even be heaven or hell depending on how high you place it on your anal threat level (I’m at red alert), I knew I’d be working my way into it slowly (or is that it would be working its way into me slowly?).

I have a completely ambivalent relationship with all things anal. I love it and I fear it. Yet, I also fear the razor blade when Victor traces it along the curve of my breast but at the same time, nothing makes me wetter. The first time I saw the 2.0 I knew I had to have it; reminiscent though it is of when I used to order everything that looked good on a menu only to be scolded by my then boyfriend, one Joey D from Howard Beach, Queens, that my eyes were bigger than my stomach. When I place the 2.0 in my palm, wrap my fingers around its hard, cool and inflexible surface, I fear that in this case my eyes are infinitely bigger than my ass.

Still, undaunted, I figured it needed a break in period and so, on the morning of my solo sex session in my car, I placed my Pfun Plug, my large Pure Plug and a few packets of lube into my purse and took off for another day at the office. Towards the end of the day, I grabbed my bag and trotted off to one of sex toy laboratories - my office bathroom. Pushing my panties to my ankles, I lubed up the pfun plug a toy geared more to men for its prostate massaging qualities, and when it was glistening and slick let the cool tip rest against my puckered hole until I couldn’t resist sliding it in. The Pfun Plug, with its relatively narrow head, slid in easily. I wasn’t used to having something so long in my butt but adapted to it quickly. If you are a new comer to anal, this is an excellent, non-threatening toy to start off with. Like all things njoy, it is shiny stainless steel and can be used with multiple partners if properly sterilized (boiling water or a 10% bleach solution do the trick).

The Pfun Plug reminds me of a long, chubby finger beckoning you to come closer. Since its design is supposed to provide prostate stimulation, a fact I can’t attest to, it is longer and slimmer than other butt plugs. Though I was skeptical, having only used plugs with that distinct cock head like shape, I was blown away by how well this worked for me. Maybe because it penetrated me deeper but I just could not help but be insanely, overwhelmingly turned on every second that it was inside me. Squeezing my muscles around it produced wave after wave of increasing sensation that had my clit throbbing and pussy soaked. From the time I had left my office until I arrived at TJ Maxx’s parking lot, I was constantly aroused.

Sitting in the car, burning with lust, needing to come, I realized that like a good sex toy reviewer I had my pocket rocket in my bag. Could I, I wondered looking around at the people steadily flowing in and out of the parking lot? Do I dare? Being parked between two cars, one of course being the ubiquitous mini-van, I decided, yes, yes, I do dare.

Dresses come in extremely handy for the woman who likes to masturbate outside the privacy of her home. I highly recommend them and have at least two converts, Diva and BadBadGirl, both claimed they couldn’t wear skirts and both now feel sexier when they do. Score! Welcome to the Cult of Tess, er,  Tess’ Spiritual and Sexual Enlightenment Center, ladies. And like me, Diva now enjoys getting off while idling the time away in traffic. Back to the matter in my panties, I pulled out my pocket rocket, pushed my easily accessible panties out of the way and rubbed the vibe around my clit in slow circles.

I tightened the muscles in my buttocks more and more, firmly clutching the steel buried deep inside me, as the pocket rocket drove me to the edge of orgasm. Pressing my back deeply against the cushioned seat and parting my legs as wide as I dared, I diverted some attention to making sure no one was wise to what I was up to , forcing me to slow down a bit. I only had to stop once as a mom approached the mini-van next to me and strapped her toddler into a car seat before taking off. The thought of getting caught, of how wrong and how right it felt, pushed me closer to the edge.

Suddenly I was there. At the edge and tumbling over. Muscles squeezing hard, ass rising off the seat, breathing shallow and rapid, lips pursing into an O as my heated breath escaped in little pants, until aI moaned loudly, forgetting for those few seconds where I was and then hastily glancing around to make sure no one had noticed. Skirt smoothed, cheeks aglow and with a smile stretching across my lips, I proceeded to shop.

When I got home I continued my experiment by removing the pfun plug and inserting the large Pure Plug. I use the Pure Plug frequently but always with a degree of trepidation. Its cock-head shaped head would only be found on the largest of cocks (the head on the 2.0 would not be found on any human being – period, if I’m wrong, send photos. Thanks.) This time I was able to get the plug in rapidly and with a only mere twinge as it stretched me further. A little pain is a good thing. A hopeful sign for having an ass full of njoy 2.0. Just ramp up.

I have always liked the large pure plug. You can wear it all day; at work, going shopping, traipsing around the city. There is no way that plug would ever fall out of my butt. The first time I wore it was on the train and I was terrified I would end up sneezing and having it fly out forcefully enough to render the poor soul sitting across from me unconscious. Alas, no one was harmed in my trials. The Pure Plug is very heavy yet somehow less noticeable to me after hours of wear then the pfun plug. Not that I ever forgot either of them was there. I can’t say I have a preference. I love them both and think you will too.

After an hour or so, I removed the large Pure Plug, held the 2.0 in my hand and shook my head. Not quite ready for it just yet. The width of the heads of the Pfun Plug is 1.25 inches and the large pure plug is 1.5 inches. They both weigh 11 ounces. The 2.0 is exactly what you’d imagine given its name – 2 inches wide and weighs in at a wicked 1.3 pounds.

Pfun Plug

Large Pure Plug

Pure Plug 2.0

I will persevere with my clinical trials in an effort to report my conclusions on the 2.0.

In the meantime, look at photos and behold the beauty that is njoy.

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Tags: Babeland, njoy, sex toy review